Oh, I wouldn’t climb this tree
If a Pooh flew like a bee.
But I wouldn’t be a bear then,
So I guess I wouldn’t care then!

Bears love honey
And I’m a Pooh bear,
So I do care,
So I’ll climb there.
..

– Excerpt from “Rumbly in My Tumbly” song, Disney’s The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (1977)

Everyone who has read or watched the charming children’s series, “Winnie the Pooh” is probably starkly aware of this fact: Pooh Bears LOVE honey. You likely also know that Tiggers love bouncing, Rabbits love gardening, Owls love reminiscing, and on it goes. Each character in Winnie the Pooh has an affinity for that “one thing” that lights up their world. When others try to suppress that “one thing” they love, the results are glum. We all can probably recollect gloomy images of: a dejected Tigger denied of his right to bounce…an exasperated Rabbit peering around at his ruined garden…a clueless Owl gazing upon his friends who have fallen asleep to his prattle…and most of all, a sad and hungry Pooh Bear deprived of his honey pot. From childhood, we sympathize with these characters because we know how important that “one thing” is to them, and to see them lost without it is piteous.

Did you ever stop to ask yourself, what is that “one thing” that lights up your husband’s world? If you know me, you probably already sense where I’m going with this. And if you’re being honest with yourself, you also know exactly what that “one thing” is…

I’ll put it bluntly: sex is to a man what honey is to a Pooh Bear. Indeed, making love to his wife is honey for a husband’s heart. When women deny their husbands of that “one thing”, the results are glum; but when women recognize their husband’s affinity for sex and embrace it, the results are glorious. Consider this Proverb:

A sated man loathes honey, but to a famished man any bitter thing is sweet. – Proverbs 27:7

Layman’s terms: a man can be so full that he turns down dessert, or he can be so hungry that he eats out of a garbage can. To relate this to sex: you can either bless your husband with so much lovemaking that he says, “enough, woman! I’ve had my fill!”, or you can leave him starving and susceptible to temptation and sin. I don’t know about you, but I prefer a sated man over a famished one any day. Keeping your husband satisfied will, in turn, satisfy you. It’s a win-win situation.

Today, I want to share three facts about honey with you. May they serve to give you a refreshing perspective on the place your “honey” holds in your husband’s heart. Honey Fact #1:


Winnie-the-Pooh sat down at the foot of the tree, put his head between his paws and began to think.
First of all he said to himself: “That buzzing-noise means something. You don’t get a buzzing-noise like that, just buzzing and buzzing, without its meaning something. If there’s a buzzing-noise, somebody’s making a buzzing-noise, and the only reason for making a buzzing-noise that I know of is because you’re a bee.”
Then he thought another long time, and said: “And the only reason for being a bee that I know of is making honey.”
And then he got up, and said: “And the only reason for making honey is so as I can eat it.” So he began to climb the tree.

A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh (1926)

Do you wish to be “Queen Bee” in your man’s life? You know the saying: you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar! You can catch a Pooh Bear all the more…but most importantly, you can catch your husband’s heart. Sex is not only the main motivation for a man to pursue a woman in the first place, but it is also the main motivation that keeps him interested and coming back to his woman, his wife.

Worldly women know how to snag a man:

For the lips of an adulteress drip honeyProverbs 5:3a

But two can play at that game. Wise women know how to keep a man:

Your lips, my bride, drip honey… Song of Solomon 4:11a

“Christian wife” and “prude” are not synonymous. Rather, a faithful helpmeet is skilled in the art of enticing her husband. She makes it her mission to “buzz” (attract), “make honey” (interact), and let her man “eat honey” (enact).

Here are some practical ways to entice your husband from morning to night:

Offer yourself to him first thing in the morning. “Show appreciation” for his male anatomy when he gets out of the shower. Dress to impress. Flash him. Talk about your desire for him. Give naughty touches. “Force” him to take time for mid-day quickies. Send him naughty texts. Brag about your girl parts. Kiss him passionately. Go to bed naked with him. Caress his nude body. Offer yourself to him before bed. Sleep in his embrace. Keep the clothes OFF! Wake up, repeat.

Enticing your husband isn’t a once-off occasion when you’re feeling frisky…no ma’am. It’s a lifestyle. Sex is a daily need for your husband that you get the privilege to fulfill. Give up the honey…for it entices.

Honey Fact # 2:


It’s a very funny thought that, if Bears were Bees,
They’d build their nests at the bottom of trees.
And that being so (if the Bees were Bears),
We shouldn’t have to climb up all these stairs.

A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh (1926)

Honey has a high calorie content…about 30% higher than that of sugar. Honey is energizing; it is enabling. It enables one to carry out their day with vigor and pep in their step. Pooh Bear notes how much easier his life would be if honey was more easily accessible…and wouldn’t the life of a husband be easier also?

A man who is sexually deprived is apt to be angry, bitter, and overtly focused on his cravings for sex. Like a starving man who can only think of one thing: “FOOD!”, a man who is starving sexually can only think of one thing: “SEX!”. His need for sexual release consumes him and makes him a good-for-nothing with a one-tract-mind.

On the other hand, a man who is sexually satisfied is apt to be happy, carefree, and have a productive work life. When his need for sex is well taken care of, it gets him out of his body and into his mind. It frees him up to be the man he wants to be, and the man you want him to be…noble, hard-working, joyous. If you keep your man “running on empty” it will only serve to benefit both of you.

Lest you find daily sex a daunting task, note that a “small smackerel of honey” goes a long way:

Have you found honey? Eat only what you need… – Proverbs 25:16

Faithful sex is a matter of regularity, not remarkability. The sex act in itself (if given passionately as a lover, not prudishly as a martyr) is remarkable to a man. Consistency is key. Give up the honey…for it enables.

Honey Fact #3:


“When you wake up in the morning, Pooh,” said Piglet at last, “What’s the first thing you say to yourself?”
“What’s for breakfast?” said Pooh. “What do you say, Piglet?”
“I say, I wonder what’s going to happen exciting today?” said Piglet.
Pooh nodded thoughtfully. “It’s the same thing,” he said.

A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh (1926)

Honey is one food that is considered to have an “eternal shelf life”. In other words, it never spoils. They say that (free of contamination), honey is perfectly edible after thousands of years. Of course, honey never spoils in Pooh Bear’s heart, either. Whether you’re reading the 1926 series, watching the 1977 movie, or bingeing on one of the many Winnie the Pooh television shows that have come out over the last few decades, one thing remains the same: Pooh Bear will always be crazy about his honey. So too, will a man always be crazy about his woman’s honey. It’s part of a male’s genetic makeup, designed by God. The love of honey endures.

Many women find their husband’s love of sex repulsive, even perverse. After all, they want to feel loved and cherished, not fondled! These women shoot themselves in the foot, for they don’t realize that their husband’s physical advances are his masculine way of loving and cherishing them. There’s a reason sex is referred to as “making love”: it literally makes a man love his wife. A man is never so tender, a woman never so doted upon, as when they come together in this way. If more wives would only surrender to the (God-ordained) sexual desire of husbands, what fulfilling marriages they would have.

Happy is the man who can say:

I have eaten my honeycomb and my honey… – from Song of Solomon 5:1

Such a man feels like king of the world, and in turn, treats his lady like royalty. (Certainly in almost every area of life, there are outliers….I’m speaking not of the sinister, villainous husband, but of the “Average Joe”) Take it from a girl who started from humble beginnings, and got her fairy-tale ending…the peasant girl who married a king. Though I began my marriage with little more in common with my husband than the fact that we both loved the Lord, we have since become the most intimate of friends and devoted of lovers. I owe this in great part to the 10+ years of daily sex that has forged us as one in soma, soul, and spirit. Truly for us, “the end of a matter is better than its beginning” (Ecclesiastes 7:8a). I hope the same for your marriage.

If you yearn for your husband’s love for you to last forever, I can not impress strongly enough to you that honey never spoils. Honey both snags a man, and it keeps a man; honey keeps him wild for his woman. Give up the honey…for it endures.


In conclusion…

Are you giving out honey for a husband’s heart? If not…why not? Your honey is enticing, enabling, and enduring. It is that “one thing” that your husband craves above all else. Don’t you think it’s about time to give your Hunny some honey? His heart will sing:

If everything is honey
And I am what I eat
I must be made of honey
And life is very sweet.

– Excerpt from “Everything is Honey” song, Disney’s Winnie the Pooh (2011)

For God’s glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks


Chaste Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

I am an American Soldier.

I am a warrior and a member of a team.

I serve the people of the United States, and live the Army Values.

I will always place the mission first.

I will never accept defeat.

I will never quit.

I will never leave a fallen comrade.

I am disciplined, physically and mentally tough, trained and proficient in my warrior tasks and drills.

I always maintain my arms, my equipment and myself.

I am an expert and I am a professional.

I stand ready to deploy, engage, and destroy, the enemies of the United States of America in close combat.

I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life.

I am an American Soldier.

Source: https://www.army.mil/values/soldiers.html

These touching words are copied from The Soldier’s Creed – a bold promise to the American people from our men in uniform.

Sure, it’s a nice read, but what does it have to do with me – a feminine woman?“, you might be wondering. Allow me to explain:

While the average wife is not out fighting for freedom on the front lines (in fact, I would argue that to do so would not be in her family’s best interest), still, she can prove to be a soldier in her own right. Wives are distinctly called to be “subject to their own husbands”. (Ephesians 5:22; Titus 2:5) Did you know that this word, “subject”, literally means “to rank under”? When I made this connection, my mind immediately went to the American soldier. A soldier gives respect to his superior officer…unfailingly. A soldier obeys orders…unquestioningly. A soldier is committed to his mission…unreservedly. Sounds a lot like a Christian wife to me!

Study the soldier’s creed in light of your role as a help meet:

Are you on your husband’s team? Do you serve him, and live out the values of a godly wife? Do you place your marital mission first? Do you shun feelings of defeat? Are you committed never to quit your mission? Are you devoted to never leaving your marriage, even should your husband fall? Are you a tough, disciplined, and proficient helper to him? Do you maintain yourself with excellent composure? Are you an expert at serving your man, a professional in your field? Do you fight against the wiles of the enemy – Satan – on a daily basis? Are you an advocate and faithful guardian of God’s pattern for marriage? Are you as straight as a soldier?

I am reminded of the classic children’s song: “I may never march in the infantry, ride in the cavalry, shoot the artillery…I may never fly o’er the enemy, but I’m in The Lord’s Army!” This chorus is most true of the Christian wife. If you are a married woman, the unique way you serve as a member of “The Lord’s Army” is by faithfully ranking under your superior officer (your husband). Even in the midst of our topsy-turvy culture, we would do well to remember that women are not to be the “mean and mighty” of the species, but rather the “meek and mild”. We serve from the homefront. If you need help in this area, consider this your Basic Combat Training!

Today, we are going to look at “The Seven Core Army Values”. These values serve as a code of conduct for our US military, and I hope you will see the uncanny parallel between being a good soldier and being a good wife. Shall we begin? Core Army Value #1 is…


Bear true faith and allegiance to the U.S. Constitution, the Army, your unit and other Soldiers. Bearing true faith and allegiance is a matter of believing in and devoting yourself to something or someone. A loyal Soldier is one who supports the leadership and stands up for fellow Soldiers. By wearing the uniform of the U.S. Army you are expressing your loyalty. And by doing your share, you show your loyalty to your unit.

Source: army.mil/values/#

Loyalty is essential in the heart of an American soldier. Should it not be even more so in the heart of a Christian wife? Exhibit loyalty in your role as a help meet, and be as straight as a soldier.

He who pursues righteousness and loyalty finds life, righteousness and honor. – Proverbs 21:21

Core Army Value #2 is…


Fulfill your obligations. Doing your duty means more than carrying out your assigned tasks. Duty means being able to accomplish tasks as part of a team. The work of the U.S. Army is a complex combination of missions, tasks and responsibilities — all in constant motion. Our work entails building one assignment onto another. You fulfill your obligations as a part of your unit every time you resist the temptation to take “shortcuts” that might undermine the integrity of the final product.

Source: army.mil/values/#

Duty is essential in the heart of an American soldier. Should it not be even more so in the heart of a Christian wife? Exhibit duty in your role as a help meet, and be as straight as a soldier.

The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. – 1 Corinthians 7:3-4

Core Army Value #3 is…


Treat people as they should be treated. In the Soldier’s Code, we pledge to “treat others with dignity and respect while expecting others to do the same.” Respect is what allows us to appreciate the best in other people. Respect is trusting that all people have done their jobs and fulfilled their duty. And self-respect is a vital ingredient with the Army value of respect, which results from knowing you have put forth your best effort. The Army is one team and each of us has something to contribute.

Source: army.mil/values/#

Respect is essential in the heart of an American soldier. Should it not be even more so in the heart of a Christian wife? Exhibit respect in your role as a help meet, and be as straight as a soldier.

…the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. – Ephesians 5:33b

Core Army Value #4 is…


Put the welfare of the nation, the Army and your subordinates before your own. Selfless service is larger than just one person. In serving your country, you are doing your duty loyally without thought of recognition or gain. The basic building block of selfless service is the commitment of each team member to go a little further, endure a little longer, and look a little closer to see how he or she can add to the effort.

Source: army.mil/values/#

Selfless service is essential in the heart of an American soldier. Should it not be even more so in the heart of a Christian wife? Exhibit selfless service in your role as a help meet, and be as straight as a soldier.

She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. – Proverbs 31:27

Core Army Value #5 is…


Live up to Army values. The nation’s highest military award is The Medal of Honor. This award goes to Soldiers who make honor a matter of daily living — Soldiers who develop the habit of being honorable, and solidify that habit with every value choice they make. Honor is a matter of carrying out, acting, and living the values of respect, duty, loyalty, selfless service, integrity and personal courage in everything you do.

Source: army.mil/values/#

Honor is essential in the heart of an American soldier. Should it not be even more so in the heart of a Christian wife? Exhibit honor in your role as a help meet, and be as straight as a soldier.

Marriage is to be held in honor among all… – Hebrews 13:4a

Core Army Value #6 is…


Do what’s right, legally and morally. Integrity is a quality you develop by adhering to moral principles. It requires that you do and say nothing that deceives others. As your integrity grows, so does the trust others place in you. The more choices you make based on integrity, the more this highly prized value will affect your relationships with family and friends, and, finally, the fundamental acceptance of yourself.

Source: army.mil/values/#

Integrity is essential in the heart of an American soldier. Should it not be even more so in the heart of a Christian wife? Exhibit integrity in your role as a help meet, and be as straight as a soldier.

…I will walk within my house in the integrity of my heart. – Psalm 101:2b

Core Army Value #7 is…


Face fear, danger or adversity (physical or moral). Personal courage has long been associated with our Army. With physical courage, it is a matter of enduring physical duress and at times risking personal safety. Facing moral fear or adversity may be a long, slow process of continuing forward on the right path, especially if taking those actions is not popular with others. You can build your personal courage by daily standing up for and acting upon the things that you know are honorable.

Source: army.mil/values/#

Personal courage is essential in the heart of an American soldier. Should it not be even more so in the heart of a Christian wife? Exhibit personal courage in your role as a help meet, and be as straight as a soldier.

Just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. – 1 Peter 3:6


In conclusion…

Do you aim to be as straight as a soldier? Then you must carefully demonstrate the seven core army values toward your husband each day:


This foolproof guide to following your husband’s “ldrship” is not only unapologetically American, but unapologetically Biblical. May you be as straight as a soldier, my fellow help meets.

Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. – Ephesians 6:13


For God’s glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks


Chaste Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.