When you feel like saying something
That you know you will regret,
Or keenly feel an insult
Not quite easy to forget,
That’s the time to curb resentment
And maintain a mental peace,
For when your mind is tranquil
All your ill thoughts simply cease.

It’s easy to be angry
When defrauded or defied,
To be peeved and disappointed
If your wishes are denied;
But to win a worthwhile battle
Over selfishness and spite,
You must learn to keep strict silence
Though you know you’re in the right.

So keep your mental balance
When confronted by a foe,
Be it enemy in ambush
Or some danger that you know.
If you are poised and tranquil
When all around is strife,
Be assured that you have mastered
The most vital thing in life.

– “Stay Calm” by Grenville Kleiser

Then you need to get a handle on your “response ability”!

Our response ability (that is, the art of composure in confrontation) says a lot about our emotional maturity, our powers of self-control, and the sincerity of our devotion to Christ. The way we hold ourselves in difficult situations often reveals the inner woman: is she a collected sage, or a prattling fool?

We should all ask ourselves from time to time, “what is my response ability?” Taking an honest look at our reactions (and adjusting them if need be) is sanctifying. Today, I want to share three points for self-evaluation. Firstly, if I aim to level-up my response ability, then I need to look into…


The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things. – Proverbs 15:28

Pondering how to answer takes time, while pouring out evil things takes no time at all. The former is the higher and nobler path, but the latter is the path of least resistance. Any fool can rant and rave in record response time, but a wise woman takes her time in formulating a response. She may even remain silent (as Jesus did before His accusers) if she perceives the conversation to be going nowhere fast. If and when she does respond, it won’t be a lightning strike, but a slow and steady rainfall. A woman of response ability is ordered and methodical, not impetuous and hysterical.

Ask yourself these questions to test your response times:

Check your response times in order to know your response ability!

This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God. – James 1:19-20

Secondly, if I aim to level-up my response ability, then I need to look into…


And the work of righteousness will be peace, and the service of righteousness, quietness and confidence forever. – Isaiah 32:17

Quietness and confidence…what a pair. The Bible calls this winning combination the “service of righteousness”. To be quiet and confident simultaneously – it is the perfect blend of standing your ground while keeping your dignity. Most people will applaud confidence, but reject quietness both in themselves and others. The quality of quietness may be underrated by mankind, but it is applauded by God. In fact, He calls the quality of a gentle and quiet spirit in a woman “imperishable”, and “precious” in His sight. (1 Peter 3:4) I’d rather be His kind of lady than a loud-mouth schnook any day of the week!

Ask yourself these questions to test your response tones:

Check your response tones in order to know your response ability!

Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. – Philippians 4:5

Lastly, if I aim to level-up my response ability, then I need to look into…


Words from the mouth of a wise man are gracious, while the lips of a fool consume him; the beginning of his talking is folly and the end of it is wicked madness. – Ecclesiastes 10:12-13

This proverb hits the bullseye! Once we allow our lips to take the reigns in heated conversation (as opposed to our spirit), the word-garbage just keeps flowing until we are in a messy heap of our own making. No matter the temptation to “sock it to ’em” and “give ’em what for”, we must filter the words we say…even to the vilest recipient. We Christian women offer words of grace to contentious people – not because they are loving, but because we are. Slow response times and quiet response tones go a long way in aiding gracious response terms.

Ask yourself these questions to test your response terms:

Check your response terms in order to know your response ability!

And while being reviled, He did not revile in return; while suffering, He uttered no threats, but kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously. – 1 Peter 2:23


In conclusion…

When evaluating your response ability, ask yourselves these three vital questions:

How are my response times? How are my response tones? How are my response terms?

In the face of opposition, remember this: it is my responsibility to better my response ability. Don’t stoop to the level of those who have no response ability of their own. Keep your cool and stand tall no matter the refuse being hurled at you, because…

…composure allays great offenses. – Ecclesiastes 10:4b

For God’s glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks


Chaste Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

How doth the little busy Bee
Improve each shining Hour,
And gather Honey all the day
From every opening Flower!
How skillfully she builds her Cell!
How neat she spreads the Wax!
And labours hard to store it well
With the sweet Food she makes.
In works of Labour or of Skill
I would be busy too:
For Satan finds some Mischief still
For idle Hands to do.

In Books, or Work, or healthful Play
Let my first Years be past,
That I may give for every Day
Some good Account at last.

– “Against Idleness and Mischief” by Isaac Watts

Idleness and mischief – the two go hand in hand. And both are held in the hands of a busybody. In his poem, Isaac Watts presents the perfect solution for the tendency to idleness and mischief: we must follow in the example of the “little busy bee” and set ourselves to a productive lifestyle. The Bible presents much the same solution for idleness…

For we hear that some among you are leading an undisciplined life, doing no work at all, but acting like busybodies. Now we command and exhort such persons in the Lord Jesus Christ to work peacefully and eat their own bread. – 2 Thessalonians 3:11-12 (emphasis added)

Read: get to work! Ironically, the cure for being a busybody is being a busy body – or in other words, keeping your body busy. Paul expounds on this cure with specific directions for women:

At the same time they also learn to be idle, as they go around from house to house; and not merely idle, but also they become gossips and busybodies, talking about things not proper to mention. Therefore, I want younger widows to get married, have children, manage their households, and give the enemy no opportunity for reproach. – 1 Timothy 5:13-14 (emphasis added)

What does Paul cite as the cure for idleness and mischief? Homemaking! A woman can learn to be an idle, gossiping busybody, or she can learn to focus on her family. She can learn to be a worker at home. (Titus 2:4-5)

My goal today is to help you learn to be a worker at home. I am going to teach you how to be a “busy body” in 8 simple steps. Step #1 is to…


A good homemaker keeps her body busy by beautifying the home.

Making a home a beautiful haven of rest for one’s family is a worthwhile pursuit…and it will certainly keep a body busy.

Beautify! Your wife shall be like a fruitful vine within your house… – Psalm 128:3a

How to be a Busy Body Step #2 is to…


A good homemaker keeps her body busy by organizing the home.

Making a home an organized haven of rest for one’s family is a worthwhile pursuit…and it will certainly keep a body busy.

Organize! …What woman, if she has ten silver coins and loses one coin, does not light a lamp and sweep the house and search carefully until she finds it? – Luke 15:8

How to be a Busy Body Step #3 is to…


A good homemaker keeps her body busy by decluttering the home.

Making a home a decluttered haven of rest for one’s family is a worthwhile pursuit…and it will certainly keep a body busy.

Declutter! A time to search and a time to give up as lost; a time to keep and a time to throw away. – Ecclesiastes 3:6

How to be a Busy Body Step #4 is to…


A good homemaker keeps her body busy by bringing yield to the home.

Making a home a yielding haven of rest for one’s family is a worthwhile pursuit…and it will certainly keep a body busy.

Yield! Give her the product of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates. – Proverbs 31:31

How to be a Busy Body Step #5 is to…


A good homemaker keeps her body busy by beatifying the home. (Beatify = sanctify, hallow, consecrate)

Making a home a beatified haven of rest for one’s family is a worthwhile pursuit…and it will certainly keep a body busy.

Beatify! The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands. – Proverbs 14:1

How to be a Busy Body Step #6 is to…


A good homemaker keeps her body busy by unplugging the home.

Making a home an unplugged haven of rest for one’s family is a worthwhile pursuit…and it will certainly keep a body busy.

Unplug! …Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life and attend to your own business and work with your hands, just as we commanded you. – 1 Thessalonians 4:11

How to be a Busy Body Step #7 is to…


A good homemaker keeps her body busy by scheduling the home.

Making a home a scheduled haven of rest for one’s family is a worthwhile pursuit…and it will certainly keep a body busy.

Schedule! Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve. – Colossians 3:23-24

How to be a Busy Body Step #8 is to…


A good homemaker keeps her body busy by yearning for the home.

Making a home a yearned for haven of rest for one’s family is a worthwhile pursuit…and it will certainly keep a body busy.

Yearn! So that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children…workers at home… – excerpt from Titus 2:4-5


In conclusion…

If you want to learn how to be a busy body, remember to:

Beautify
Organize
Declutter
Yield
Beatify
Unplug
Schedule
Yearn

Keep your B.O.D.Y. B.U.S.Y. with these 8 steps, and you’ll be a busy body in no time…in fact, you’ll be so invested in your own home that you’ll simply have no time to be a busybody!

She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. – Proverbs 31:27

For God’s glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks


Chaste Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.