Destress the Damsel

One of the students turns to his friend and asks, “What are ‘ignorance and apathy?'”

The other student, bored, restless and wanting the speech to end says, “I don’t know and I don’t care.”

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“I don’t know” and “I don’t care” unfortunately represent some people’s view towards Christianity. And I’m not just talking about atheists: there are even those who go to church regularly, have love for their neighbors, and live morally upstanding lives – (all these things are of course expected from each of us) – but yet they are still missing something. What, might you ask?

See, I believe there is a great plague in the world today: It is “hand-me-down religiosity” or as I am calling it, “inbred ignorance”. What I am talking about here is a lack of independence when it comes to our faith. There are too many of us who aren’t reading our bibles and truly seeking God’s will for our lives. We think that “what’s good enough for Grandma and Grandpa is good enough for me”…

Unfortunately, “Grandma and Grandpa” don’t always have it right. All too often we borrow someone else’s beliefs without actually looking for the true answers ourselves. Beliefs get passed on from generation to generation, and tradition becomes “truth”. But friends, we MUST find out for ourselves what it is God wants from us, lest He spit us out of His mouth.

We can’t rely on someone else’s beliefs to carry us through life, and God’s not going to give us a sign. God expects us to use our own minds!

– Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ. (‭Colossians‬ ‭2‬:‭8‬ KJV) – 

A doctrine that I am convinced that many err on, is that of salvation. Ask, and you will get a hundred different answers to the age-old question “What must I do to be saved?”. Some will say you need only to believe, another “say this prayer”, while yet another insists infant baptism washes away sins. Friends, we cannot afford to get this wrong! If we don’t even know how and by what we are saved, how can we be sure we are saved?

– Teach me good judgment and knowledge: for I have believed thy commandments. (‭Psalms‬ ‭119‬:‭66‬ KJV) –

Maybe up until this point you have borrowed your religion from your parents, your minister, or another respected person. You are not alone – this is a mistake that has been made by millions. We’ve all been guilty of this! But I am telling you right now, it is not too late to learn the truth! As a wise friend once told me “It’s not always in the learning, but in the re-learning”. Stick around, and let’s re-learn some things together. God’s word will be our guide….

– The heart of the prudent getteth knowledge; and the ear of the wise seeketh knowledge. (‭Proverbs‬ ‭18‬:‭15‬ KJV) –
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“What must I do to be saved?”

The first steps – Hearing/ Believing –

Friends, it is undeniable that salvation is rooted in faith. Now that is not to say that faith is our only means of salvation, but it is definitely a crucial element. To be saved, we must first….

—  Hear, understand and believe the word of God.

– Whom shall he teach knowledge? and whom shall he make to understand doctrine? them that are weaned from the milk, and drawn from the breasts. (‭Isaiah‬ ‭28‬:‭9‬ KJV) –

(Reason for yourselves: is a child capable of this? If the answer is no then *just maybe* infant baptism is a false doctrine)

– He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned. (‭Mark‬ ‭16‬:‭16‬ KJV) –
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“What must I do to be Saved?”

Step 2 – Confess (submit your life to God) and Repent (turn away from your sin)

Some false teachers out there say that faith alone will win us citizenship in heaven. They claim that God doesn’t really demand anything from us – “just only believe and you will be saved”! My friends – do not be deceived, but search for yourself whether or not God demands a change in our lives. If we keep thinking John 3:16 is the complete summation of the Bible and never read any further, I really fear for our souls.

– Whosoever transgresseth, and abideth not in the doctrine of Christ, hath not God. He that abideth in the doctrine of Christ, he hath both the Father and the Son. (‭2 John‬ ‭1‬:‭9‬ KJV) –

Confession and repentance go hand in hand. You simply can not have the one without the other. If you are submitting your life to God, then you will turn from your sin! On the other hand, what person is going to turn away from sin without first submitting their life to God?

– He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy . Proverbs 28:13 –

(Note that it says confess AND forsake – a confession is never legitimate to our Lord without repentance)
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“What must I do to be saved?”

Step 3 – Be baptized (greek; baptizo = immersion)

While I assume nearly everyone teaches that you must believe to be saved, and also many will encourage a change of lifestyle, baptism has become one of the most controversial topics in the religious world. Unfortunately it is a widely accepted belief that baptism is just an optional step that a Christian can take: an outward sign of their already established walk with Christ. I beg to differ with that view, and rather am firmly convicted that baptism is an essential step one takes before they will be accepted into God’s kingdom. Here are a few reasons why. I would encourage you to read each one of these passages and discern whether or not baptism is essential to our salvation.

— Jesus (our ultimate example) was baptized (‭Luke‬ ‭12‬:‭50‬ KJV) 

— Those in the first century A.D. that “gladly received His word” were baptized, and added into the church!  (‭Acts‬ ‭2‬:‭40-41‬ KJV) 

— In Jesus’ day, “all who heard him justified God and were baptized” but the Pharisees and lawyers who rejected baptism were a disgrace. (‭Luke‬ ‭7‬:‭29-31‬ KJV) 

— *If* we have been baptized into Christ, we have put on Christ. (‭Galatians‬ ‭3‬:‭27‬ KJV) 

— All who have been baptized are baptized into Christ’s death. If we are not baptized, we can not be partakers of the gift of the cross! (‭Romans‬ ‭6‬:‭3-7‬ KJV) 

— Baptism is “answering with a clear conscience to God” and “baptism saves us!” (‭1 Peter‬ ‭3‬:‭20-21‬ KJV) 

— Jesus said “we will be baptized with His baptism”…if we are His, we will follow in His footsteps. (‭Matthew‬ ‭20‬:‭23‬ KJV) 

— Jesus said we cannot see the kingdom of God unless we are baptized. (John 3:3)

— We must believe *and* be baptized to be saved. (Mark 16:16)

— Baptism “washes away sins”. (Acts 22:16)

— Baptism is “for the remission of sins” (Acts 2:38)
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My dear friends who are reading this – have you truly been saved?

Sometimes in life we must forget what we have been told. You and I must put away our preconceived notions and let go of all the traditions of man! If we do this, we may not be the most popular or have the most friends, but we will have something many don’t have. We will have God’s word! We will have it in fullness. And God’s word has the answers, if we are willing to look.

It teaches that we must hear and believe the word of God. We must confess Christ daily by submitting our lives to Him. We must turn from our sins through repentance. We must be baptized (immersed in water) for the remission of our sins. After we have submitted ourselves to God’s plan of salvation (forsaking man’s way) – it is at that point we have become adopted as a child of God. We know from scripture that there are those claiming Christ that are not truly saved. May we not be counted among them!

– Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. (‭Matthew‬ ‭7‬:‭21‬ KJV) –

– This people draweth nigh unto me with their mouth, and honoureth me with their lips; but their heart is far from me. But in vain they do worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men. (‭Matthew‬ ‭15‬:‭8-9‬ KJV) –

Remember the student in the gymnasium.  Don’t let his academic path be the same as your religious design.

Where we are ignorant – let us search for wisdom.

Where we are apathetic – let us search for purpose.

It is the glory of God to conceal a thing: but the honour of kings is to search out a matter.(Proverbs 25:2 KJV)

God bless, and take a chill pill!
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

Ladies, I want each of you to remember as you are reading this that our hormones are a natural part of all of us. —BUT— just like anything that comes naturally to us, our hormones can get us in a world of trouble. We need to realize that 1. We are more than flesh and bones. 2. We are more than our feelings, and 3. We belong to a faithful God, and He is able to provide an escape for every temptation we might face – if only we will turn to Him. (1 Corinthians 10:13)

“So if hormones are just a natural part of life, how do I know if they have gotten out of control? How do I know when to say NO to this part of my flesh? ”

I need to say NO when….

1. My hormones CONSOLE me (emotionally)

Sometimes we allow our feelings to get the best of us, and what’s more…sometimes we find this rather enjoyable. Admit it, we all enjoy a good pity party every now and again! {insert sarcasm here} Okay – while we might not think we particularly thrill in sorrow, let’s be honest…if we didn’t find some enjoyment in feeling sorry for ourselves, why would we do it? Girls, when we feel consoled by our hormones, we are letting ourselves be caught up in a dangerous addiction that leads right down the road to nowhere. Our Lord doesn’t look too kindly on those who choose to be in a perpetual state of misery, but rather reproves them! (Think Jonah, Martha, and The Israelites to name only a few!)

In Ecclesiastes 7:3 it says that sorrow is better than laughter, and by sadness our heart is actually made better! Keeping that thought in mind, let us ponder 2 Corinthians 7:10. This passage teaches us that there is a godly sorrow that brings forth repentance; on the other hand, there is a worldly sorrow that brings forth death.

Our emotions should be spent on Godly things like:

Sorrow for our sins – leading us to a repentant response.

-or-

Feeling pity for others – leading us to a compassionate response.

Galatians 6:8 …He that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting. 9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

Let us ask ourselves whether or not our hormonal woes are leading us towards Godly responses in life!

I need to say NO when…

2. My hormones CONTROL me (physically)

What does a hormonal response to worldly sorrow look like?

I’ll tell you….it looks carnal, savage, and out of control! Once we have let our hormones console us, the next step in the addiction is to let our hormones control us. Ladies, when we are following our flesh rather than God’s Spirit, if we feel upset we are going to act out in ways that a Christian should never act. If we feel hurt, we’re automatically going to get spiteful. Ungoverned, our hormones can have us swearing at the neighbors, screaming at the kids and essentially going through life ready to fly off the handle at anyone who looks at us wrong. This is not the way God expects His children to handle life.

Let us look at Ephesians 2:2, taking care to pay special attention to the emphasized words.

“In times past we….walked according to the course of this world; walked according to the prince of the power of the air….our conversations were in the lusts of the flesh; we fulfilled the desires of the flesh and mind; we were by nature the children of wrath.”

Notice how these were all things we used  to do. Now that we are Christians, we are held to a higher standard of holiness than non-believers. We will not be held unaccountable if we continue in sin without repentance!

Galatians 5:24 …They that are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.

I need to say NO when…

3. My hormones TAKE A TOLL on me (spiritually)

Finally, we will know and be known by our fruits. Every tree that does not bring forth good fruit will be cut down and cast into the fire. (Matthew 7:19) Does a woman led by her hormones bring forth good fruit? I’m afraid not.

It is true that at times we might feel hopeless. We might be asking ourselves how we will ever be able to restrain ourselves from worldly responses when our hormones are encouraging us to pity ourselves, lash out at others, etc. The answer is in these two passages:

Romans 13:14 …Put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof.

Galatians 5:16 …Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.

– Excerpt from Louis Armstrong & Bing Crosby’s “Gone Fishin”

When I read these lyrics for the first time, it painted a picture in my mind of an unfruitful Christian. The story applies to all of us on occasion: we should be hoeing, but we’re out fishing instead…”we aint got no ambition”! This could vaguely apply to so many areas of our lives, but let us consider how it ties in to the sin of gossip.

Too often we are in a situation where, given the opportunity to bless with our mouth, we choose rather to use our words for cursing; for slandering; for gossiping! Gossip is a sin frequently looked over, because on the surface it seems somewhat harmless. Let me put this quite plainly. Gossip is NEVER harmless. Gossip always hurts the person gossiping, the person being gossiped about, and more often than not, both parties.
What exactly is gossip? Gossip is relaying one person’s personal business to another without their consent. Gossip typically – though not always – puts the first person in a bad light.

“Gossip is putting two and two together and making it five” – Ivan Panin

Gossip may be true, partially true, or completely untrue, but the fact of the matter remains: gossiping has no part in the life of the Christian. Gossip hurts.
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Gossip hurts ME

– It has been said that “What Susie says of Sally says more of Susie than of Sally”, and in most cases, I believe this statement to be quite true. When we speak, we are opening a door for others to see right into our hearts. Proverbs 10:11 states that “The mouth of a righteous man is a well of life”. Let us ask ourselves honestly: Can words of gossip be a well of life? If the answer is no, then how can we continue in this sin, claiming the name of Christ “in whom there is no unrighteousness”? (Ps. 92:15, Rom. 9:14) 

He that utters a slander is a fool. (Proverbs 10:18b)

A talebearer revealeth secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter. (Proverbs 11:13 )

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Gossip hurts OTHERS

– Leviticus 19:16 says: Thou shalt not go up and down as a talebearer among thy people: neither shalt thou stand against the blood of thy neighbour; I am the Lord.

Do you notice how talebearing (gossiping, slandering) is lumped together with “standing against the blood of thy neighbor”? This verse illustrates perfectly how detrimental gossip really is. When we speak ill against our neighbor, it is one and the same as if we had killed him. Consider the “murder” caused by unsavory speech: Gossip can put a damper on friendships and marriages, it can divide churches – ultimately gossip KILLS reputations and burns everyone in it’s path.

An ungodly man diggeth up evil: and in his lips there is as a burning fire. A froward man soweth strife: and a whisperer separateth chief friends. (Proverbs 16:27-28)

He that goeth about as a talebearer revealeth secrets: therefore meddle not with him that flattereth with his lips. (Proverbs 20:19)

How great a matter a little fire kindleth! (James 3:5b)

Remember: whether gossip is true or not matters little in the sight of our holy God…It is a shame even to speak of those things done in secret (Ephesians 5:12)
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Gossip hurts THE CHURCH

Where there is no talebearer, the strife ceaseth. (Proverbs 26:20)

1 Thessalonians 4:11 “…study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you; 12 That ye may walk honestly toward them that are without, and that ye may have lack of nothing.”

– Gossip puts a bad light on Christ’s church. If the world hears us speaking evil against our neighbors, do you think they want to become a part of us? How can people see the love of Christ in us if we act just as dysfunctional as those who are lost? My mother-in-law is known to say that “If we can’t get along here on earth, how do you think we’ll get along in heaven?” – and it is so true! If we don’t have LOVE for one another we are nothing (1 Cor. 13:2), and gossip is certainly not loving! In fact, love as described in 1 Corinthians 13 is partially defined as “thinking no evil” and “rejoicing not in iniquity, but rejoicing in the truth!” (v 5b-6) A far cry from everything that gossip is…

– Gossip keeps us from doing the work of the church:

2 Thessalonians 11 For we hear that there are some which walk among you disorderly, working not at all, but are busybodies.

1 Timothy 5:13 And withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not.

If we are spending our time focusing on and talking about the faults of others, we have far too much time on our hands….time that should be being used to further God’s kingdom! Gossip only serves to further Satan’s purposes, and does nothing but harm to ours.
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Conclusion:

A good rule of thumb is that if we are not part of the solution to the problem, it is best to keep silent. Always run any hint of gossip through these filters: What is my goal in sharing this? Is my involvement in this situation needed, or am I meddling in things that are no concern of mine? Talking just for the sake of talking is idle speech. An old saying applies: “idle hands are the devil’s workshop”. Every time we gossip, we open up the door for many more sins to enter our hearts and minds.

Proverbs 18:7 A fool’s mouth is his destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul. 8 The words of a talebearer are as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly.

Ladies, let us not be likened unto the foolish man, but let our speech always be seasoned with salt, that it might minister grace unto the hearers!

God bless, and take a chill pill!
Mrs. Dustin Bolks