MAJOR Minor Problems
by 
Wars have been and wars will be
Till the human race is run;
Battles red by land and sea,
Never peace beneath the sun.
I am old and little care;
I’ll be cold, my lips be dumb:
Brother mine, beware, beware . . .
Evil looms the wrath to come.
Eastern skies are dark with strife,
Western lands are stark with fear;
Rumours of world-war are rife,
Armageddon draweth near.
If your carcase you would save,
Hear, oh hear, the dreadful drum!
Fly to forest, cower in cave . . .
Brother, heed the wrath to come!
Brother, you were born too late;
Human life is but a breath.
Men delve deep, where darkly wait
Sinister the seeds of death,
There’s no moment to delay;
Sorrowing the stars are blind.
Little Brother, how I pray
You may sanctuary find.
Peoples of the world succumb . . .
Fly, poor fools, the WRATH TO COME!
– “Little Brother” by Robert William Service
As I peruse this cautionary poem from a big brother to his little brother, I wonder how it would be received by that “little brother,” were there such a living, breathing recipient. Would “Little Brother” take the warning to heart, pack his bags, and be on the next plane out? Would he dismiss the message as only mildly important, shelve it, and promise himself to give it more attention at a later date? Would he scoff in disbelief, crumple up the note, and throw it in the garbage? The big brother sounded a warning…but would his little brother listen?
As I write to you today, I feel a lot like the big brother in our poem. I see danger looming in the not-so-far-off distance. I feel compelled to cry out, “fly, poor fools, the wrath to come!” I fear that many will dismiss or even scoff at my words of warning. Just the same, I feel a fire burning in my bones to warn all of my “little sisters” of doom on the horizon. If only one sister takes the message to heart, my words will not have been in vain.
In today’s article, MAJOR Minor Problems, I will be sounding the warning about three very real dangers I see in our present-day youth culture. Lest there be any head scratching, this title isn’t an oxymoron, but a pun: I intend to unveil some MAJOR problems concerning today’s minors (“minors” being those members of society who are below the legal age of majority. For those of us who live in the United States of America, this term describes any person less than 18 years old). The first MAJOR problem concerning today’s minors is…
A woman shall not wear man’s clothing, nor shall a man put on a woman’s clothing; for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord your God. – Deuteronomy 22:5
Written into God’s law is a grave warning against women imitating men and men imitating women. While some may argue that we are no longer under OT Law (agreed), I assert that the moral truth of this passage stands the test of time. In fact, the New Testament reiterates that “[no] effeminate…shall inherit the kingdom of God“. (1 Corinthians 6:9-10) Note that the sin of effeminacy is distinct from the sin of homosexuality mentioned in the very same text. To put it simply, not only is it wrong for one to be a homosexual, but it’s also wrong for one to act like a homosexual. That is what Deuteronomy 22:5 is ultimately driving at. See, a person’s clothing is closely tied to their identity. Women who desire to be perceived as masculine will wear masculine clothing, and men who desire to be perceived as feminine will wear feminine clothing. Those who imitate the opposite gender, portraying a false identity, are described as “abominations” to the Lord our God.
Danger, danger! Our present-day youth culture has a MAJOR minor problem: the biology problem. We are living in a time when gender confusion is becoming more and more “normal”. There is the obvious extreme of transgenderism, but I assume most of you reading my blog are already deeply opposed to such an extreme, thus requiring little warning about the topic. Transgenderism is not nearly as rampant as the media would have us believe. Most of today’s youth are not undergoing sex changes or hormone therapy. Most of today’s youth are not asking to be identified by different “pronouns” than they were “assigned at birth”. Most of today’s youth do not consider themselves members of the “LGBTQ+ community”. (In fact, current data reveals that only 9.3% of all Americans identify as anything other than heterosexual in 2025.) To warn against the dangers of transgenderism and homosexuality is certainly valid, but it is not my goal today. The danger I am here to warn you about is much more hidden, much more subtle, and much more far-reaching: androgyny.
an·drog·y·ny
noun
the quality or state of being neither specifically feminine or masculine, or
the combination of feminine and masculine characteristics.
Even without the sex changes, the hormone therapy, the different pronouns, and the LGBTQ+ membership, our present-day youths are finding ways to press boundaries and blur the lines between male and female. As a general rule, today’s girls are getting harder, and today’s boys are getting softer. We, as a society, are losing touch with the qualities that make each gender unique. The most liberal among us cannot even explain the difference between a man and a woman. But I’m afraid that neither can most conservatives. Sure, your average conservative can point out some obvious differences (i.e. a man has a penis, a woman has a vagina; a man has pecks, a woman has breasts; only a man can impregnate, only a woman can be pregnant; and so on and so forth). But aside from these rudimentary examples, many still do not know what makes a man a man, or what makes a woman a woman. In the year 2025, masculinity and femininity are out, and androgyny is in.
Gone are the days when gritty guys like John Wayne were role models for boys, and lovely ladies like Audrey Hepburn were role models for girls. By and large, the celebrities that today’s teens idolize are feminized young men and masculinized young women…cheap replicas of the opposite gender. The film, music, and video game industries are hotbeds of gender confusion. One of the biggest offenders is anime, which is increasingly popular with today’s youth. Stemming from Asia (note: the world’s least Christian continent), anime routinely glorifies the “pretty boy” and the “tough girl”. Though not as blatant (yet), American television is following the same trajectory as the Eastern world. Male characters are often sensitive, emotional, and tragic (emulating feminine features) while female characters are unaffected, logical, and carefree (emulating masculine features). Instead of the good old-fashioned “damsel-in-distress” trope, we now see a female lead, strong and sure, swooping in to rescue the poor, pitiful male lead. In the music world, male singers are hitting the high notes, and female singers are hitting the low notes. Modern video games (such as Fortnite) teach boys how to dance in a disturbingly effeminate style. Have no illusions: none of these trends are coincidental. They are part of an intentional plan to disorient, disconnect, dismantle, and destroy the nuclear family…the bedrock of civilization.
I am calling on all mothers to do their part in combating The Biology Problem. Do what you can to prevent today’s gender-confused celebrities from infiltrating your home. Make it a point to select your children’s films, music, video games, and even books with great caution. (However, always defer to your husband’s judgment as the head of his home.) Teach your boys how a man behaves…how he walks and talks and dresses and wears his hair. Do the same for your girls. Show them how a woman conducts herself…from how she moves and speaks, to her clothing and hairstyle selections. Unless men be men and women be women, civilization will surely crumble and fall. And “if the foundations are destroyed, what can the righteous do?” (Psalm 11:3)
Make boys masculine again! Make girls feminine again! This is how we beat the MAJOR biology problem.
The second MAJOR problem concerning today’s minors is…
Now flee from youthful lusts, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. – 2 Timothy 2:22
There are four things that the New Testament explicitly warns us to “flee” from: 1.) immorality (1 Corinthians 6:18), 2.) idolatry (1 Corinthians 10:14), 3.) avarice (1 Timothy 6:10-11), and 4.) youthful lusts (see above). Many parents are not only neglecting to actively restrain their teenagers from these things, but are even allowing them to openly embrace two of the four: immorality and youthful lusts. “What do you mean, ‘openly embrace’ those things?” you might ask. Well, our culture calls it teen dating. I call it glorified divorce practice.
Danger, danger! Our present-day youth culture has a MAJOR minor problem: the chronology problem. We are living in a time when adolescents are given license “to have and to hold” each other…before they have come of age to vow the same before God and man. Often, these adolescents have little supervision and even less self-restraint. They kiss, cuddle, make out, grope, etc. and are merely cautioned not to “go all the way”. This is the folly of follies, mothers. It’s like handing a toddler a gun and telling them to play with it, but not to shoot anyone. It’s like giving a diabetic a chocolate cake and telling them to have a smell, but not a taste. It’s like leaving a burglar in a mall overnight and expecting them to come out empty handed. It’s like fanning a flame and thinking it won’t burn. God warns us to flee immorality and youthful lusts for a reason. He knows that two people who love each other are going to, well…love each other. This is why 1 Corinthians 7:9 says: if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn (i.e. with passion). Marriage is the cure for immorality and youthful lusts. But here’s where the problem lies: minors (generally speaking) can’t get married! If your teen isn’t ready to marry, then they certainly aren’t ready to burn with passion (read: date).
Anyone who is unmarried (and furthermore, is not in a position to get married anytime soon) has no business being in a physically romantic relationship. Again and again I have witnessed two teenagers who were “head over heels in love” – teenagers who kissed, cuddled, made out, groped, and (more often than not) engaged in sexual activity – go their separate ways. On they go to kiss, cuddle, make out, grope, and (more often than not) engage in sexual activity with the next person. How any Christian parent thinks this is acceptable teen behavior is beyond me. Even if your adolescent doesn’t “go all the way” with their boyfriend/girlfriend, they are giving themselves in impure ways to someone who is not their husband/wife. Let me ask you this: are we as Christians okay with married people kissing someone who is not their spouse? How about cuddling them, or making out with them, or groping them? If not, why not? Could it have anything to do with the fact that such pleasures are reserved for husbands and wives? Now, I’m not suggesting going to the extreme that some parents go to: “no touching the opposite gender”. Rather, I am suggesting, “no touching the opposite gender in romantic ways”. If that guideline is too vague, here is a simple example for all singles: how does a brother touch his sister/how does a sister touch her brother? Siblings don’t refrain from all touch, but they do refrain from romantic touch. Not to be vulgar, but I wouldn’t be caught dead swapping spit with my brother, or rubbing my breasts on him. (Ew!) Obviously teens who are attracted to one another aren’t going to feel the repulsion that one sibling has for another, but I merely use the brother/sister analogy as an appeal to purity. After all, the unmarried should be treating each other as brothers and sisters in Christ, not honorary spouses.
I will be the first to say that I believe teenagers can fall deeply in love. I also believe that having “all that love and nowhere to go” is asking for trouble. If you as a parent are allowing your minor to burn with passion, it is only right that you allow them to marry, as scripture prescribes. This is one of of the primary reasons that emancipation laws exist…so that kids who are mad about each other can get out of “limbo” and be a genuine couple once and for all. Unfortunately, I rarely see parents take the honorable approach of emancipating their besotted minors. Instead, I see dads and moms allowing their teens to date freely, all while encouraging them to marry “after college”, or “after traveling the world”, or “after they play the field”. Such parents aren’t helping their minors to flee immorality and youthful lusts…but they are helping them to fall into sin and heartbreak.
I am calling on all mothers to do their part in combating The Chronology Problem. Do what you can to prevent your teen from falling in love prematurely. This doesn’t mean locking them up in the dungeon and pretending boys/girls don’t exist. It means restraining them from dating until they are old enough to do something about their desires (read: get married). Adolescents can get to know members of the opposite sex in pure, supervised settings. Don’t be so naive to think that your teen is a special case and can be trusted to go off alone with his/her love interest. No matter how outstanding your kid may be, he or she has a sex drive like anyone else. Each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. (James 1:14)
Help your boys restrain! Help your girls refrain! This is how we beat the MAJOR chronology problem.
The third MAJOR problem concerning today’s minors is…
He who separates himself seeks his own desire, he quarrels against all sound wisdom. – Proverbs 18:1
I have often heard it said that “the more connected we become, the more disconnected we become”. This is a sad truth pointing out one of the main drawbacks of our digital age. The telephone, originally invented as a means to communicate with someone from a distance, has itself evolved to become “man’s best friend”. No longer merely an instrument to make calls with, our modern smartphones contain a practically infinite portal to the world…and they fit in the palm of our hand. It is estimated that 95% of teens own a cell phone in 2025.
Danger, danger! Our present-day youth culture has a MAJOR minor problem: the technology problem. We are living in a time when adolescents have nearly unmitigated access to a world bent on chewing them up and spitting them out. Like never before, teens are able to separate themselves from the guidance of their parents and seek their own desires through their cellular service. No longer does a teen boy have to sneak a quick peek at girly pics on the family computer in a shared space. He can simply view all the pornography he wants on his very own cell phone! No longer does a teen girl have to compare her looks to the most popular girl in her hometown. She can simply scroll social media for hours and rank herself against all the gorgeous influencers! While some dads and moms do purchase cell phones with strict parental controls, a surprising amount of parents let minors follow their own (underdeveloped) judgment in these matters. Such teens freely listen to any music that suits them, watch any videos that suit them, read up on whatever topics suit them, text and call whomever they like, send and receive photos to their heart’s content, and the list goes on. Proverbs 29:15 cautions parents that a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother. The literal Hebrew translation is a child “left to himself” brings shame to his mother. Just as I said before in regards to teen dating: your child is not the shining exception to the rule. All minors need parental supervision, period.
I, for one, got my first cell phone when I was 18 years of age. Let this sink in: I lived 17 years without my own cell phone. The horror! Can you imagine? I may have lifelong scars, but believe it or not, I actually survived to tell the tale of this harrowing experience. Okay, sarcasm aside, I am immensely thankful for my smartphone free childhood. Instead of watching the latest TikToks, I was watching The Sound of Music on our VCR. Instead of playing mobile apps, I was playing Donkey Kong Country with my Dad on the old Super Nintendo. Instead of browsing social media, I was browsing my Mom’s vast book collection. Instead of viewing perfectly curated photos of nature, I was viewing nature. Instead of adding a new friend on Snapchat, I was adding a new friend to my game of Marco Polo at the local swimming pool. Sadly, wholesome real-life experiences such as these are becoming fewer and farther between for today’s youth. In 2023, Common Sense Media reported that the average teen was spending 4.5hrs/day on their cell phone, or ≈28% of their waking day. (These statistics ought to be concerning for anyone, of course…but today we’re talking specifically about minors.) I feel zero resentment towards my parents for restraining me from having a cell phone until I reached majority age. Did their decision deprive me? Certainly. Their (prudent) decision deprived me of brain rot, and a loss of focus. It deprived me of social conditioning, and a loss of individuality. It deprived me of depression/anxiety, and a loss of self-worth. It deprived me of temptation, and a loss of innocence. Thanks, Dad and Mom…for depriving me.
I am calling on all mothers to do their part in combating The Technology Problem. Do what you can to prevent the world wide web from consuming your teen’s heart and mind. Being a good parent often requires going against the grain. Your teen may balk against being one of the meager 5% of teens without a cell phone. Stand firm. Your teen may balk against having strict parental controls on his or her cell phone, when all his/her friends have free rein over theirs. Stand firm. I miss hearing parents quip, “if so and so jumped off a bridge, would you?” It’s time to grow a backbone and stop letting peer-pressure dictate our choices. Just because “everyone else” is doing something does not mean it’s the correct way. (see Matthew 7:13-14)
Guide boys and girls toward real-life activities again! This is how we beat the MAJOR technology problem.
In conclusion…
We are experiencing some MAJOR Minor Problems in our present-day youth culture. Instead of burying our heads in the sand, it is high time that Christian parents stand up and face The Biology Problem, The Chronology Problem, and The Technology Problem. Fathers are the architects of civilization, and mothers are the gatekeepers. Each of us must do what we can to positively influence our culture, and it starts at home. (Keep in mind that wicked and rebellious children will always find a way to defy their parents’ good teaching. Nevertheless, we hold up the standard of God’s word for them anyway…this will judge them in the last day.)
Until next time, I leave you with the comforting words of my favorite wizard, Gandalf the White:
Other evils there are that may come… …Yet it is not our part to master all the tides of the world, but to do what is in us for the succour of those years wherein we are set, uprooting the evil in the fields that we know, so that those who live after may have clean earth to till. What weather they shall have is not ours to rule. – J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King
For God’s glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks
Chaste Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.
