Think pink! think pink! when you shop for summer clothes.
Think pink! think pink! if you want that quel-que chose.
Red is dead, blue is through,
Green’s obscene, brown’s taboo.
And there is not the slightest excuse for plum or puce
—or chartreuse.
…
Now, I wouldn’t presume to tell a woman
what a woman oughtta think,
But tell her if she’s gotta think: think pink—!

—for bags! pink for shoes!
Razzle, dazzle and spread the news!
And pink’s for the lady with joie de vive!
Pinks for all the family.
Try pink shampoo.
Pink toothpaste too.
Play in pink, all day in pink,
Pretty gay in pink.

Drive in pink, come alive in pink,
Have a dive in pink.
…
Think pink! think pink, it’s the latest word, you know.
Think pink! think pink and you’re Michelangelo.

Feels so gay, feels so bright.
Makes you day, makes you night.
Pink is now the color to which
you gotta switch!
…
Think pink! think pink on the long, long road ahead.
…
Think pink and the world is rosey-red
…
Everything on the great horizon,
Everything that you can think—
and that includes the kitchen sink,
Think pink!
…
– excerpts of “Think Pink” lyrics from Funny Face (1957 Film)

If there is a record for the song that says “pink” more times than any other, this one just might take the cake. I counted 25 mentions, and this is only a portion of the whimsical song lyrics. That’s a whole lot of pink! While I’m more of a teal lover myself, I can appreciate a pretty shade of pink as much as the next girl – it’s just plain fun. However, (as I’m sure you’ve guessed) I’m not here to break down which color is most pleasing to the eye – I’m here to teach you how to Think Pink, and employ The Power of Positivity!

“Pink” (aside from being the color that results when one mixes red and white) can be defined as:

“The highest or best form, degree, or example of something”

So, if we are to have the highest and best form, degree, and example of thoughts, we need to Think Pink!

“Think pink! think pink on the long, long road ahead.
…
Think pink and the world is rosey-red“

No matter the trials we face along the way, we can choose to maintain a positive outlook – counting our blessings and dwelling on all that’s right in our life, rather than all that’s wrong. How we think has a profound effect on all three aspects of our human makeup – from soma, to soul, to spirit. Negative thinking patterns can bring great harm to our physical wellness, our social standing, and our relationship with God. Today, I want to share with you three ways that you can start “Thinking Pink” in order to level up your thought patterns, and consequently, your life. Firstly, to keep your soma in tip-top shape, you must…

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Wellness is a connection of paths: knowledge and action.

Joshua Holtz

Mr. Holtz is right on target. One must think healthy in order to be healthy. First we get the mind right, and then we move forward with action steps. As the famous saying goes, “you can’t pray for an A and study for a B”. Total wellness starts with 1.) right thoughts, coupled with 2.) right choices that help make our health a reality. Now, am I saying that if we think the right thoughts and make the right choices, we can always prevent all maladies (such as the common cold, stomach flu, diabetes, or cancer)? Of course not. “Time and chance overtake them all” says the scripture, and that includes illness; no one is 100% immune to health problems, no matter how healthy their mindset. With that being said, many of the fleshly trials we endure could be prevented or lessened by thinking healthy. Here are three examples…

Obesity can usually be avoided by thinking healthy about food and exercise. To be in shape, our mindset needs to be “eating to live” rather than “living to eat”, and we must learn to enjoy labor rather than giving in to sloth. Those who think, “It’s too hard. I’m just fat and I always will be” will never shed the pounds.

Lung cancer can usually be avoided by thinking healthy about tobacco usage. To have clear lungs, our mindset needs to be one of controlling our cravings rather than being controlled by our cravings. We humans quickly become a slave to anything we “have to have” – some to the point of death. Those who think, “I’ll never quit. I’m an addict and I always will be” will never put down the cigarettes.

Stomach ulcers can usually be avoided by thinking healthy about our problems. To have a healthy tummy, our mindset needs to be focused on our blessings rather than our curses. When “the joy of the Lord is our refuge“, our stress levels decrease dramatically. Those who think, “Nothing will ever be right for me. I’m anxious and depressed and I always will be” will never feel a sense of inner peace – in the tummy or the heart.

While not every illness can be avoided by a healthy mindset, many can. Furthermore, thinking healthy will be an aid to us when our body is at risk of falling prey to various illnesses. Consider the common cold. Thinking healthy makes us more aware of hygiene (i.e. washing hands, laundering clothes, wiping down door handles, etc.) when we have been exposed to others who are sick, thus lessening our chance of contracting the virus. Thinking healthy makes us reach for fruits and veggies rather than sugary confections when we have a cold, thus shortening the length of our downtime. Thinking healthy makes us value wellness, thus rendering us more grateful and productive in times of health and vigor. Thinking healthy benefits us before, during, and after illness. So think pink! Think healthy for a healthy soma.

A joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones. – Proverbs 17:22

Secondly, to keep your soul in tip-top shape, you must…

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The greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances.

Martha Washington

Indeed, wise Mrs. Washington, our first First Lady. Maintaining a happy disposition no matter the circumstance is something we all seem to know is ideal, but so quickly forget to do when a “bad day” rolls around. Speaking of “bad days”, are they really so numerous as we believe them to be? One of my favorite convicting sayings is, “Was it a bad day? Or a bad 5 minutes that you milked all day?”. Bad days certainly exist, but let’s face it – more often than not, “bad days” are the result of milking a bad 5 minutes. We women can so easily become drama queens, throw ourselves a great big pity party over the smallest frustration, and waste away a good day on account of a bad attitude. If we’re honest with ourselves, we sometimes think (in a twisted way) that it feels good to feel bad. But is being miserable really all it’s cracked up to be?

Women who brood in misery set themselves up for all kinds of sin. They neglect to count their blessings. They grumble and complain. They lash out at their husbands and children. They say words they later regret. They use manipulation tactics, such as “the silent treatment”. They replay offenses in their mind again and again. They spill out gossip and slander to anyone who will listen, for “misery loves company”. They end up hindering their own relationships, because no one wants to be around someone who is chronically unhappy. The snowball effect continues. Nothing good comes from wallowing in self pity. Oswald Chambers said in his famous work, My Utmost For His Highest, that “self pity is of the devil”, and we would do well to remember this sobering truth.

So how do you think happy? You do the exact opposite of the scenario I painted above. Remember to count your blessings. Talk about things that are right rather than things that are wrong. Treat your family with kindness and gentility. Opt for silence when you feel out of control. Refuse to act childish and play head games. Forgive and forget offenses. Don’t air dirty laundry to others. Cultivate a cheerful disposition that makes people want to be around you. This time, the snowball effect is filled with rich rewards. So think pink! Think happy for a happy soul.

When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul. – Psalm 94:19

Thirdly, to keep your spirit in tip-top shape, you must…

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You are not what you think you are, but what you think…you are!

– David Jeremiah

This sermon-title-turned-quote from David Jeremiah hits the nail on the head. The things that we choose to think about are, in essence, our identity. Every day, the thoughts that we dwell on are building us into the person we will become…for better or worse. When I was a teenager and struggling with low self-esteem, I would sometimes bemoan, “I’m so ugly!” Without skipping a beat, my father would always reply: “If you think ugly, you are ugly. If you think pretty, you are pretty.” My response was probably something along the lines of, “Okay, sure Dad, thanks…but I’m still ugly. My mirror doesn’t lie.” As an adult, I realize that in his clever rebuttal to my laments of ugliness, there are at least two positive messages to extract…

1.) Confidence is key. The way that we view ourselves affects the way that we show up in the world. People often view us the way we view ourselves. Poor self-esteem is unappealing, while confidence is attractive. When we think, “I’m pretty”, and go on to act like it, we set the tone for how others see us.

2.) Inner beauty trumps outer beauty. (This is not to say that outer beauty is insignificant – only less important overall) If your thoughts are hideous, you are hideous. If your thoughts are gorgeous, you are gorgeous. When you cultivate inner beauty, worthwhile people who get to know you will see a value that goes beyond physical appearance.

Do you think ugly, or do you think pretty? What do you fill your mind with? Love, or hate? Positivity, or negativity? Life, or death? Forgiveness, or revenge? Blessings, or curses? Sweet words, or swear words? Contentment, or covetousness? Fidelity, or adultery? Obedience, or defiance? Hope, or despair? Truth, or lies? Remember, what we think…we are. So think pink! Think holy for a holy spirit.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, Lord, my rock and my Redeemer. – Psalm 19:14

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In conclusion…

Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. – Philippians 4:8

In this famous passage, Paul and Timothy gave a beautiful summary of what it is to Think Pink. These two men encountered various trials in their lives, but nonetheless chose to embrace The Power of Positivity. We also can choose to Think Healthy, Think Happy, and Think Holy, no matter our circumstances. If you have a tendency to fall into negativity and pessimism, my challenge to you is to start Thinking Pink. Use the Philippians passage to guide you…it’s not just pretty words to display on a Bible cover, but the message holds the key to defeating negativity and embracing positive thinking.

Think Pink. Do it for your soma. Do it for your soul. Do it for your spirit.

If your soma is sound, you’re healthy. If your soul is sound, you’re happy. If your spirit is sound, you’re holy.

Dustin Bolks

For God’s glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

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Chaste Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

Do you believe in magic in a young girl’s heart?
How the music can free her whenever it starts
And it’s magic if the music is groovy
It makes you feel happy like an old-time movie
I’ll tell you about the magic, and it’ll free your soul
But it’s like trying to tell a stranger ’bout a rock ‘n’ roll

If you believe in magic, don’t bother to choose
If it’s jug band music or rhythm and blues
Just go and listen, it’ll start with a smile
That won’t wipe off your face no matter how hard you try
Your feet start tapping, and you can’t seem to find
How you got there, so just blow your mind

If you believe in magic, come along with me
We’ll dance until morning ’til there’s just you and me
And maybe if the music is right
I’ll meet you tomorrow sorta late at night
And we’ll go dancing baby, then you’ll see
How the magic’s in the music, and the music’s in me

Yeah, do you believe in magic?
Yeah, believe in the magic of a young girl’s soul
Believe in the magic of a rock ‘n’ roll
Believe in the magic that can set you free
Ahh, talking ’bout magic

Do you believe in magic?
(Do you believe like I believe?) Do you believe, believer?
(Do you believe like I believe?) Do you believe in magic?
(Do you believe like I believe?) Do you believe in magic?

– “Do You Believe in Magic?” by The Lovin’ Spoonful

I’m of the opinion that this is one of the happiest oldies there is. I would venture to guess that anyone who doesn’t “believe in magic” (the magic of music, that is) will start believing post haste once they listen to this heartwarming classic. [In case there’s any question, no I am not in support of singles meeting late at night and dancing into the wee hours of morning – but hey, it’s a great idea for married couples! These song lyrics are quite wholesome within the innocent and appropriate context of marriage.]

I’ll put to you the same question that The Lovin’ Spoonful put before their audience:

Do you believe, believer? Do you believe in magic?

There is certainly a “magical” element to music. Music is powerful – it has the power to evoke strong feelings in the listener. Feelings of joy, feelings of sorrow…feelings of motivation, feelings of lethargy…feelings of goodwill, feelings of angst…and the list goes on. The world is full of songs:

Christian songs. Worldly songs. Romance songs. Breakup songs. Songs for a friend. Songs for an enemy. Songs about Heaven. Songs about Hell. Songs about cats. Songs about dogs. Wedding songs. Funeral songs. Happy songs. Sad songs. Songs about sports cars. Songs about pickup trucks. Songs with meaningful lyrics. Songs with nonsensical lyrics. Fast songs. Slow songs. I can go on all night, but I think you get the point. You’d be hard pressed to find any style or subject that hasn’t been utilized by an artist in the music industry.

Considering how affecting music can be on the soul (both melodically and lyrically), we would do well to take account of what kind of musical content we consume. Today, I want us to realize two spellbinding facts about The Magic of Music. First, we should know that there is…

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Music has charms to soothe a savage breast, / To soften rocks, or bend a knotted oak.

– William Congreve, The Mourning Bride (1697)

The melody of a song can have a mighty influence over our emotions…for better or worse.

• Have you ever listened to a sad song and felt a deep sense of sorrow, even though you were feeling just fine before?

• Have you ever listened to an upbeat song and felt a smile creep onto your face, even though you were previously feeling crabby?

If you’ve ever been in one of these situations, you were likely being influenced by the magic in the melody. A song’s melody can greatly affect our mood. With that being said, doesn’t it stand to reason that the melody we choose should be aligned with the mood we choose? If I want to turn my frown upside down, listening to some cheery music just might do the trick. If I want to embrace a reflective mood, listening to some somber music may help me to do so. Music can be a tool to help us pursue the right feelings when we need a push in one direction or another. There is a time for all kinds of melodies, because there is…

A time to weep and a time to laugh; A time to mourn and a time to dance. Ecclesiastes 3:4

Happy songs are not inherently superior to sad songs, or vice versa…rather, each style has its place. Melodies, in and of themselves, can be neither good nor bad. But sometimes, a melody that’s appropriate at one time, may not be appropriate at another time (i.e. Playing the celebratory “Pomp and Circumstance” is uplifting at a graduation, but would be grossly out of place at a funeral.) Or sometimes, a melody that’s appropriate for one person, may not be appropriate for another (i.e. A happy-go-lucky person may benefit from listening to a heart wrenching song every now and again in order to expand their empathy and emotional depth, but a person who battles depression indulging in such would most likely only be taking a downward spiral emotionally.) We can use melodies to help us light up the right neural pathways in our brains, whether the moment calls for grief or glee. Sow seeds of melancholy music to reap a melancholy mood, and sow seeds of merry music to reap a merry mood – a time for everything, and everything in its time.

Consider how David used the magic in the melody to elevate Saul’s moods:

Now the Spirit of the Lord left Saul, and an evil spirit from the Lord terrified him. Saul’s servants then said to him, “Behold now, an evil spirit from God is terrifying you. May our lord now command your servants who are before you. Have them search for a man who is a skillful musician on the harp; and it shall come about whenever the evil spirit from God is upon you, that he shall play the harp with his hand, and you will become well.” So Saul said to his servants, “Now select for me a man who can play well, and bring him to me.”…

…So it came about whenever the evil spirit from God came to Saul, David would take the harp and play it with his hand; and Saul would feel relieved and become well, and the evil spirit would leave him. – 1 Samuel 16:14-17,23

David’s music made Saul 1.) feel relieved, 2.) become well, and 3.) be left alone by the evil spirit that terrified him. Now that’s some kind of magic in the melody! Unfortunately, music’s power only goes so far. It can help us change our mood, but it cannot make us change our mind. Ultimately, Saul’s jealousy and hatred consumed him to the point that he tried to murder David on more than one occasion even while the harp was being played. (1 Samuel 18:10-11, 19:9-10) Saul was on the right track with his positive musical selections, but he needed to do the positive inner work also. May we learn from his mistake, and better both our moods and our minds – using music as a tool to help us reach our destination.

Do you believe in magic? There is indeed magic in the melody. You should also know that there is…

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Music is a part of us, and either ennobles or degrades our behavior.

– Boethius, De Institutione Musica (6th C. A.D.)

The message of a song can have a mighty influence over our thoughts…for better or worse.

• Have you ever listened to a song with a positive message and felt inspired to conform with the ideals presented therein?

• Have you ever listened to a song with a negative message, ignored your conscience, and justified listening to it because the words were so catchy?

If you’ve ever been in one of these situations, you were likely being influenced by the magic in the message. A song usually hooks us with an entrancing melody, and then traps us with an engaging message. Musical artists can use this technique for good or evil. A catchy song will have you memorizing every word…and those words can be anywhere from the books of the Bible to words about drunkenness, drug addiction, or illicit sex. We have to be careful what we allow into our minds, because once a message has been cemented, it’s hard to remove. The songs we indulge in not only get stuck in our brains, but also get sunk in our hearts. I suspect Moses had a grasp on this idea when he shared his “favorite song”:

The Lord is my strength and my song, and He has become my salvation… – Exodus 15:2a

Songs get in us and become a part of us. This is one reason why God directs us to sing in worship…it not only exonerates Him, but it writes the message into our own heart and the hearts of others.

Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God. – Colossians 3:16

I encourage you to take stock of your music list and reject songs that don’t align with Christian virtues and values. Not only does listening to ungodly music line the pockets of degenerate musical artists, but it will slowly chip away at your moral integrity until your conscience is seared with a hot iron. No catchy song is worth that kind of trade-off.

For what good will it do a person if he gains the whole world, but forfeits his soul? Or what will a person give in exchange for his soul? – Matthew 16:26

Not music, surely. My soul over my songs all day, every day!

It is better to listen to the rebuke of a wise man than for one to listen to the song of fools. – Ecclesiastes 7:5

If we choose to “listen to the song of fools”, we become fools ourselves. As wrong as it is to participate in sin, let us not forget that to approve of sin is wrong as well. (Romans 1:28-32) We may not be women who lie, steal, drink, do drugs, fornicate, commit adultery, etc. – but if we jam out to songs that boast of such, we are in essence saying, “I approve this message”. While melodies cannot be inherently good or bad, a message certainly can be. Pay heed to the manner of lyrics you stream into your noggin!

Do you believe in magic? There is indeed magic in the message.

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In conclusion…

Do you believe, believer? (Do you believe like I believe?) Do you believe in magic?

When it comes to our musical selections, we must remember The Magic of Music. There is magic in the melody, and there is magic in the message. May each of us be careful to choose songs that make us pleased to say, “the magic’s in the music, and the music’s in me!” For, as the great musician once said:

All music should have no other end and aim than the glory of God and the soul’s refreshment; where this is not remembered there is no real music but only a devilish hub-bub.

– Johann Sebastian Bach

For God’s glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

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Chaste Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

On January 8, 2014, I published my very first “welcome” post on Destress the Damsel. It hardly seems possible that time has flown by so fast, but here I am 10 years later, bringing to you my 123rd article!

My hope is that every “damsel” who has visited my blog has come away in some regard a better wife, a better mother, a better woman. If one lady learned one thing from Destress the Damsel that she implemented into her life for good, this work has not been in vain. If one lady learned to love her husband or children a little bit more, if one lady learned to be a little bit more sensible or pure, if one lady learned to be a little bit better of a worker at home, or to be a little bit more kind, or a little bit better at subjecting to her husband…I say “mission accomplished”. (Titus 2:4-5)

For today’s article, I want to share a brief highlight reel of the last ten years with you. There will be a “Chaste’s Choice Award” for my personal favorite article from each year. (Yes, I went back and read all 122!) Sometimes it was incredibly hard to pick a favorite (whether because that year’s articles were so good or so bad, I’ll let you be the judge) but this list is about as definitive as it’s gonna get. At the end, I will reveal my #1 all-time favorite article. Are you ready for some nostalgia? Let’s take it back to 2014…

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Chaste’s Choice: Erroneous Equality

In this early blog, Lil’ Baby Chaste shares about the importance of being a submissive wife in a world that demands “equality” for men and women. While I had a long way to go with my writing and organization skills 10 years ago, the scriptural truths found in Erroneous Equality stand the test of time.

Chaste’s Choice: Sporadic Surrender

This article cites several reasons why we should obey God on His terms, and at all times. Many proclaim their love for God, but those who are accepted are not those who engage in Sporadic Surrender, but those who live their lives in full surrender to God each and every day.

Chaste’s Choice: Father Knows Best

Light-years ahead of my first two years of blogging material, by this time I was using illustrations, introductions, conclusions, outlines, and photos in my articles. Father Knows Best addresses 5 significant ways that mothers can encourage their children to honor their fathers.

Chaste’s Choice: Working With Winter

Seasons come and seasons go, and Winter is no exception. In Working With Winter, I compare the trials of this life to the Winter season. Read to learn 3 encouraging facts about Winter that are applicable for both a dismal season of year and a dismal season of life.

Chaste’s Choice: A Mary Heart

Mary, the Mother of Jesus: was she just an ordinary lady, or did she have a touch of the extraordinary? One thing we know, she was a woman of virtue that we would do well to emulate. A Mary Heart focuses on 3 special attributes of Mary that made her an exceptional choice for being the mother of our Lord.

Chaste’s Choice: Thankful in Theory

The Thanksgiving holiday can be a joyous time of celebration, or a stressful time of chaos…and we women have a lot to do with setting the tone for the home. Thankful in Theory gives 5 practical tips on how to be a pumpkin to your family on Thanksgiving. (That is, unless you’d rather follow the 5 tongue-in-cheek tips on how to be a turkey!)

Chaste’s Choice: H.O.W. A Man-Eater Is Made

What do crocodiles, lions, sharks, and angry women have in common? They all have the propensity for being a man-eater! There are 3 options for H.O.W. A Man-Eater Is Made that are revealed in this article. Check them out so you can avoid becoming the most dangerous “man-eater” of all!

Chaste’s Choice: Intoxicating Masculinity

“Toxic Masculinity” is a favored phrase of 21^st century feminists…but is masculinity really toxic? For those of us who love our husbands and God’s design for manhood, Intoxicating Masculinity is more like it! “15 things I love about my man” is the theme of this blog that encourages wives to look for and praise the good in their own husbands.

Chaste’s Choice: Lopsided Love – Living Like Leah

Do you ever feel unloved by your husband? Jacob’s wife, Leah, knew all about the sorrow of unrequited love. Lopsided Love – Living Like Leah shares 9 unique ways that she dealt with her pain. Take another look at this underrated Bible figure – I bet you’ll never see her in the same way again!

Chaste’s Choice: Meme, Myself, and I

In today’s digital age, access to social media can be both a blessing and a curse. For some, it leans far more on the curse side of things. How healthy is your usage of social media? In Meme, Myself, and I, we consider 5 dangers to be aware of when using online platforms.

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Before my #1 all-time favorite article is revealed, allow me to share with you 3 honorable mentions…

On Account of Angels – learn 3 things that wives have in common with these heavenly beings.

How to “Merry” a Married Man – discover 3 foolproof ways to make your husband wild for you.

My Future is Female – gather 22 tips and tricks that are guaranteed to level up your femininity.

Don’t sleep on these three eye-opening articles…they will put your God-given feminine energy into overdrive and make a queen out of you.

Now, without further ado, my #1 Chaste’s Choice Award goes to…

Is there any surprise here? Anyone who knows me, knows that my husband is my superhero…and Intoxicating Masculinity exonerates him both as the head of my home and the love of my life. But my love for my man is not the only reason I fancy this article. I chose Intoxicating Masculinity as my #1 Chaste’s Choice Award because it is a frank and fearless representation of the two (inseparable) topics I am most passionate about: Godly Marriage and Biblical Gender Ethics. This no-holds-barred article that honors the masculinity of men will certainly make any feminist’s head spin, yet it will ignite a fervent flame of love in the hearts of truth-seeking, feminine wives. If you are a wife who strives to be a lover and not a fighter, this one’s for you.

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In conclusion…

It has been a joy and privilege to serve you “damsels” from this humble little corner of the World Wide Web. Destress the Damsel has afforded me much purpose and personal growth over the last ten years. I must admit, not every blogging day was rainbows and butterflies. There have been days when I battled every blogger’s worst enemy: writer’s block, days when I felt like throwing in the towel, days when I asked myself, “what’s the point, does anyone even read this old thing?”. My blog has never exactly been a booming website with a large audience. Frankly, there is little interest these days in being a Titus 2 woman. However, what keeps me writing is that one lady I referenced back in the intro. The one lady who I could maybe, just maybe, encourage and inspire to be a better human being. Maybe that one lady is a past reader, a present reader, or even a future reader. Maybe that one lady is you. Sometimes, that one lady is me…because when I teach, I learn. Whoever you are, wherever you are, Destress the Damsel is a labor of love for you…and I hope I have the opportunity to serve you for another ten years, and beyond.

Do you have a favorite article you’d like to share? It would make my day to find out in the comment section below.

For God’s glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

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Chaste Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.