The Art of Archery

09.30.2017 by Chaste Bolks // Leave a Comment

William Tell, William Tell,
Take your arrow, grip it well.
There’s the apple – aim for the middle –
Oh well…you just missed by a little.
– Shel Silverstein

I am sure we have all seen a depiction of William Tell in some way, shape, or form. He was the legendary fellow with a shot so precise that he was said to have been able to shoot an apple off a man’s head without incident! Of course this silly poem suggests that William hit the man this time – not the apple. There’s no turning back from a faux pas such as that!

As it was with William Tell, the precision of our aim can be a matter of life and death. More specifically, the precision of the aim by which we direct our own little arrows – our children. This is precisely what we will be discussing today…

Psalm 127:3-5 says:

Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.

What are the implications of a child being likened to an arrow?

– An arrow is a projectile weapon.
– An arrow is an object with a specific task – to hit a desired goal.
– An arrow is beneficial for both offensive and defensive purposes.

We as christians are fighting against “spiritual wickedness in high places” (Ephesians 6:12) and we are raising up the next generation that will pick up the fight after we have laid down our armor. We won’t be around forever, and one day the little people in our charge will be at the forefront of the battle. This revelation can either be horrifying or awe-inspiring. My earnest hope is that it will be the latter of the two.

Not only does our text reveal that children are like arrows, but it also implies that being a good parent is like being a skilled archer. Perhaps if we want to learn how to parent God’s way and send good soldiers out into the fight, we need to learn a little something about archery. So come along…pick up your bow, and let each of us learn how to be marvelous marksmen for the Master!

“Notice that the psalmist doesn’t say kids are like clubs or rocks. A club doesn’t take a whole lot of skill to use, and anyone can throw a rock. But if you’ve tried your hand at archery, you know it’s difficult. It’s not easy to be accurate with an arrow.” – Jon Courson’s Application Commentary: Old Testament Volume 2: Psalms – Malachi

Let us consider the three things every archer must have to make a successful shot…

#1 Marksman Must: A Precise Point

Every marksman must aim his arrow.

A skilled marksman does not shoot an arrow with his eyes closed and hope for the best. Rather, he sets his sight on a precise point (his target) and aims accordingly.

A good archer is known not by his arrows, but by his aim. – Thomas Fuller

Parents, it is not how great your children are presently, but it is how great they will grow to become with proper guidance. See, merely having a child will not render us skilled parents any more than having an arrow in our possession renders us skilled archers! If we don’t know how to aim, an arrow is utterly useless in our grasp. Yet if we will learn how to aim well, we will already be one third of the way towards making a perfect shot!

Be forewarned: perfecting aim will take practice. Neither archery nor parenting are for the faint of heart. Becoming skilled archers is going to take time, diligence, and continual learning. Are we up for the challenge?

We’ve all heard the term “keep your eyes on the prize”, and we need to continually keep this in mind as we train our arrows. In a world of stress, chaos, and just plain business, it’s easy to get distracted from what’s truly important. However, a good archer can not allow distractions to get in the way of his winning shot. In the same way, parents can not allow the world to block their view of the eternal goal they desire for their child.

A child needs to know that the high achievement you wish for him is a heavenly citizenship. Everything else is pittance in comparison! He needs to know that he doesn’t have to be the best ballplayer, or the class valedictorian, or go on to have the most highly acclaimed career. Put too many expectations on your child and he will surely become dazed and confused at best, and wild and rebellious at worst. Help him to understand that godliness is his primary goal, not a slew of earthly accomplishments. Train him above all else to emulate Jesus. This is the precise point we’re going for.

I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. – Phillipians 3:14

How are we going to make sure our children are aimed at this mark? Unfortunately, there is no cut and dry, one-size-fits-all answer. Every child is different and it is our duty as parents to figure out how to win our unique child’s heart to the truth. We all know Proverbs 6:6…

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

It’s time we look at this passage with a new set of eyes. This verse is not saying that if we teach a child about Jesus, everything will turn out alright and that even if he strays he’ll come around in the end (though this is the typical belief). There have been many people who have been taught the truth yet went their own way and never returned! It is important to emphasize the “he” in this passage…”train up a child in the way HE should go”. In other words, find out what “clicks” with your child, and then and only then will you be able to win his heart over for Christ. Study your child. Figure out how to bring his spiritual side alive according to his unique personality and character. After all, does a skilled marksman not know his own arrows? Learn your child, and use your knowledge to eliminate his weaknesses and cultivate his strengths.

“Potential energy is the stored energy that an object posesses, either due to its position or its internal properties. There are many types of potential energy including chemical potential energy, which can be converted to electrical energy when we attach a circuit to the battery’s terminals.” – 30-Second Physics, (Consultant Editor: Brian Clegg)

All children (like arrows) have potential energy. It is our job as parents to figure out how to convert that potential energy to kinetic energy. Once they are “plugged in”, (that is: blossoming in their own unique skill set), you will begin to see the beauty of what was inside them all along.

“It is a wise father [or mother] that knows his own child.” – Shakespeare, The Merchant of Venice (1596-97)

#2 Marksman Must: A Preparatory Pull

Every marksman must ready his arrow.

A successful archer knows just how much momentum to add to his arrow before he sends it from his bow. If he does not pull his arrow back far enough into the bow, it will plunge to the ground before it ever hits the target. If he pulls it back too far into the bow, it will go flying way out of bounds and will also never hit the target. Neither method works. He must add just the right amount of pressure – but not too much – for his arrow to hit the mark.

Parenting is much the same way. If we fail to pull our arrows far enough into the “bow” (i.e. by letting them have their own way all the time, or letting them continually be influenced by ungodly company) then they will surely and swiftly hit the ground. This is no way to ready an arrow for a heavenly goal. Yet on the flip side, if we pull our arrows too far into the bow (i.e. by inflicting overbearing restrictions or sheltering them too much) that child is going to be rebelliously running for the hills and will also fail to reach a heavenly goal. We need to find a happy medium between both extremes.

We can not be so foolish to think that without hard work and diligence our children will “turn out okay”. That’s not the way this whole parenting thing works…

The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame. – Proverbs 29:15

Allow this truth to sink in: even a wicked man is diligent to ready his arrows for wickedness…

For, lo, the wicked bend their bow, they make ready their arrow upon the string, that they may privily shoot at the upright in heart. – Psalm 11:2

The world is not resting…they train their children to do evil day and night. We certainly should not be resting…but picking up our bows like the skilled marksmen we are called to be!

One thing I have found, is that quality time can go farther with children than all the punishing in the world. The more time a child spends with his parent, the more opportunity for bonding. The stronger the bond, the stronger the desire to please his parents. [Aren’t we the same way? The more time we spend “bonding” with our Lord, the stronger our desire to please Him. It just makes sense.] Bonding brings about love, and love brings about respect. (And if a child does not learn how to respect his parents in fear and reverence as a youth, how will he ever bow his knee to an almighty God as an adult?)

Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? – Hebrews 12:9

Remember, mothers…we (under our husband’s authority) are shooting our arrows in the way that they will go. What they learn now will, to a large degree, determine the course of their future.

“If men live decently it is because discipline saves their very lives for them.” – Sophocles, Antigone (442-41 B.C.)

Discipline is the most vital aspect of raising children. When I say “discipline”, I don’t necessarily mean “punishment” (though there is a time and a place for consequences when the child’s behavior is out of control). What I mean is training, training, and more training! Children need direction in spades. When we become a parent, we are essentially taking a small human and showing him/her how to be a big human. Right?? We grow their bodies by providing them with nutritious meals, we grow their souls by providing them with a healthy environment, and we grow their spirits by providing truth to them. None of these growing experiences can happen on their own…kids need their parents to continually direct them in all aspects until they learn to provide these things for themselves.

Every parent is readying their child for adulthood in some way, whether for good or evil, or for some sad place in between. Every day our actions and words are training them…these things are either drawing them closer to God, or further away from Him. What is the case with your child?

And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. – Deuteronomy 6:6-7

#3 Marksman Must: A Perfect Projection

Every marksman must let go of his arrow.

Every day, starting with conception, we are pushing our children one step closer to life on their own. With each and every new ability learned, our children are stepping farther away from Father and Mother’s care. This is just as it should be.

“Schoolmasters and parents exist to be grown out of.” – John Wolfenden, Sunday Times, London (July 13, 1958)

Many parents wish to hold onto their children forever, but this simply can not be. One of the greatest gifts you can give your child is the gift of independence. Every element of training is ultimately leading to this, and we must take great care not to stand in the way of this most natural and healthy process. Children are made to grow up.

When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. – 1 Corinthians 13:11

“We find ourselves more taken with the running up and down, the games, and puerile simplicities of our children, than we do, afterward, with their most complete actions; as if we had loved them for our sport, like monkeys, and not as men.” – Montaigne (1580-88)

Wanting our children to stay forever young is a selfish notion. If you want your arrow to hit the mark, let it go. I have seen many a woman fall apart and fail to know what to do with herself once her children have “flown the nest”. Mothers, it is so important that you remember that your role of “wife” is to be first and foremost in your life. Yes, it is a role superior even to that of “mom”. God did not create us to be one with our children, and women who act as such are nursing an unhealthy and unspiritual obsession. Always remember that you are married to your husband, not to your offspring. Delight in the husband God has created you for! Don’t let your children’s flying the nest leave you a broken mess as the case has sadly been with so many.

Let your arrow be free to fly. Don’t despair, take joy in a job well done! Stand back, and let your heart be light as you watch your child rise to their full potential.

If the arrow does not leave the bow, it will not strike. – Ahmad Fuadi

In conclusion…

If you would be a successful marksman and send your arrows soaring to that eternal mark…be absolutely sure that you have a precise point, a preparatory pull, and a perfect projection.

As a result,

…their arrows shall be as of a mighty expert man; none shall return in vain. – Jeremiah 50:9

For God’s Glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

Mrs. Dustin Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

The Wonderful Wizard of Welkin

08.31.2017 by Chaste Bolks // 8 Comments

Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high
There’s a land that I’ve heard of once in a lullaby.
Somewhere over the rainbow, skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream, really do come true.
Someday I’ll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me.
Where troubles melt like lemon drops,
High above the chimney tops,
That’s where you’ll find me.
Somewhere over the rainbow, blue birds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can’t I?
If happy little bluebirds fly beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can’t I?

– “Over the Rainbow”, as performed by Judy Garland in The Wizard of Oz (1939)

I remember the first time I watched “The Wizard of Oz”. As I recall, I was around nine years old…and I was mesmerized. From the moment Dorothy Gale leaned against a hay bale and began daydreaming about that proverbial “somewhere” over the rainbow, I longed to see how her story would end. Would she find what she was looking for? Or would she always wear that sad, faraway look on her face? I had to find out. So I sat there – glued to the screen – and drifted into a magical world where scarecrows, tinmen, and lions could talk, where good witches scared off bad ones, and a yellow brick road led to a wizard that held the magic fix to all of life’s problems. While to this day I still love the imagery, acting, and storyline represented in this classic film, I have to admit that there was one thing that left me utterly disappointed…the wizard.

After what seemed like a good long while of hearing:

“We’re off to see the Wizard
The wonderful Wizard of Oz
We hear he is a whiz of a wiz
If ever a wiz there was
If ever, oh ever a wiz there was
The Wizard of Oz is one because
Because, because, because, because, because
Because of the wonderful things he does….”

…I guess you could say he really fell flat of my expectations. Whiz of a wiz? Hmmm….not really. All these wonderful things he supposedly did? Well, I’m still waiting! I was hoping this guy would be great and powerful like the song suggested…but he turned out to be more or less a fraud. Just an average guy behind a curtain…pretending to be great and powerful.

I did a little investigating and found out that “Oz” is actually an abbreviation that stands for gold. I found this amusing…remember that the idols that Israel worshipped were often fashioned of gold! How fitting for this fraudulent wizard to be known as the wizard of gold = a false god!

Consider Psalms 115:4-9:

Their idols are silver and gold, the work of men’s hands. They have mouths, but they speak not: eyes have they, but they see not: They have ears, but they hear not: noses have they, but they smell not: They have hands, but they handle not: feet have they, but they walk not: neither speak they through their throat. They that make them are like unto them; so is every one that trusteth in them. O Israel, trust thou in the Lord: he is their help and their shield.

Dorothy, the Scarecrow, the Tinman, and the Lion were all seeking after the right things (a home, a brain, a heart, and the nerve), but they were trying to get them from the wrong source! Instead of seeking after The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, they should have really been seeking after The Wonderful Wizard of Welkin. (Now, if you are familiar with my September 2016 article, The Wisdom of Welkin, then you know that the term “Welkin” is a synonym for Heaven.) Therefore, The Wonderful Wizard of Welkin is none other than the Lord Himself!

The Wizard of Oz may disappoint, but The Wizard of Welkin will never disappoint. Today, let each of us transport our minds to a certain yellow brick road, accompanied by a scarecrow, a tinman, and a lion. Only rather than setting off to see The Wizard of Oz, we will set off to see the The Wonderful Wizard of Welkin…

1. He Will Give You A Brain

Oh, I could tell you why the ocean’s near the shore. I could think of things I never thunk before. And then I’d sit, and think some more! I would not be just a nuffin’, my head all full of stuffin’, my heart all full of pain. I would dance and be merry, life would be a ding-a-derry if I only had a brain…

In The Wizard of Oz, Scarecrow wants a brain more than anything in the world. His search is a search for wisdom.

The Scarecrow: That’s the trouble. I can’t make up my mind. I haven’t got a brain – only straw.
Dorothy Gale: How can you talk if you haven’t got a brain?
The Scarecrow: I don’t know. But some people without brains do an awful lot of talking, don’t they?

Proverbs 4:7 tells us that “wisdom is the principle thing“, and urges us to “get wisdom, and with all our getting, get understanding“. Scarecrow’s love and longing for wisdom is half the battle. We know from Proverbs 1:7 that “fools despise wisdom and instruction“, but here we see a fellow who is actively seeking to be wise…

For if there be first a willing mind, it is accepted according to that a man hath, and not according to that he hath not.
– 2 Corinthians 8:12

Do you and I have willing minds?
Are we daily seeking to be wise?
Furthermore, are we seeking our wisdom from The Wizard of Oz, or The Wizard of Welkin?

There is a big difference between the false wisdom of the world, and the true wisdom from above. We read in James 3:15 that there is an earthly “wisdom“…one that is “sensual and devilish“. Yet we know that “the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God” (1 Corinthians 3:19). We as Christians ought rather to be seeking “the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him” (that is to say, Jesus – Ephesians 1:17)

Where can we get this wisdom? Certainly we will not receive it from the teachers of this world, with whom religious truth is sadly becoming obsolete! No…to receive the wisdom that is from above, we must make time to read the word of God – His Bible. The scriptures “are able to make us wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus” (2 Timothy 3:15). I don’t know about you, but to me that sounds like a book worth reading! If salvation is found in the scriptures, then doesn’t it stand to reason that we ought to be immersing ourselves in them?

I have more understanding than all my teachers: for thy testimonies are my meditation. I understand more than the ancients, because I keep thy precepts. – Psalms 119:99-100

Take time each day to learn something new about God. Bible study doesn’t mean that we’re reading 30 chapters a day, and it doesn’t mean that we’re getting in our bibles just to cross it off our mental checklists. What it does mean is that we are daily learning something that will help us to better understand the character of our Lord, or instruct us on how to be better people. Some days this might mean reading one verse, or some days it might mean reading 100 verses…but for crying out loud, get in His word!
Challenge yourself by studying up on a topic you’re unsure about. Maybe you’ve always wanted to know if children are or are not born sinless, or whether or not baptism is essential for salvation, or if gambling is or is not a sin. Whatever the topic, don’t wait to hear it from someone else – go to the source and study it out for yourself! Be like the Berean Jews who “were more noble…and searched the scriptures daily, to see whether these things were so” (from Acts 17:11).
Make sure you are not forsaking the assembly. Stay true and faithful to the body of Christ! I can not express to you the many things I have learned from sitting under a seasoned preacher that I would not have otherwise thought of on my own. We need a preacher to help direct our minds (Romans 10:14). We also need other Christians, for the varied wisdom we gleam from one another is immeasurable (Proverbs 27:17).

There is no need to say “if I only had a brain”. Study your scriptures, and The Wonderful Wizard of Welkin will give you one!

If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him. – James 1:5

What would you do with a brain if you had one? – Dorothy Gale

2. He Will Give You A Heart

When a man’s an empy kettle he should be on his mettle, and yet I’m torn apart. Just because I’m presumin’ that I could be kinda human if I only had a heart…

In The Wizard of Oz, the Tinman wanted a heart more than anything in the world. His search was a search for love.

Once we begin to learn the wisdom of God, we will then be able to learn the love of God. Love without wisdom is worldly folly. Yet on the other hand, wisdom without love is cold and cruel. We need both wisdom and love as children of God. In fact, love is the characteristic by which we might be known as true Christians (1 John 3:14).

And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness. – Colossians 3:14

Show love to others by looking at yourself through their eyes. Are you constantly criticizing your husband or children? Try to put yourself in their shoes and imagine what it’s like to be put down all the time. Do you have a judgmental, self-righteous attitude that makes others feel uncomfortable? Try to imagine what it’s like to walk on eggshells, always worrying about needlessly offending someone. Are you self-centered and talk too much? Try to imagine what it’s like to have to listen to someone drone on and on about themselves. Looking at ourselves through the eyes of another does wonders on changing our perspective.
Show love to others by being sacrificial. When someone needs you, don’t play the martyr by acting like they’re really putting you out. That doesn’t make people feel loved…it makes them feel like a burden! As much as possible, be willing to be there for others and let them know that they can always count on you to be there for them. For example, if your husband asks you for something (even if you just sat down) get on your feet, smile, and get him what he needs. Don’t sigh…don’t say “I can’t do everything around here!”…swallow your pride, act like Jesus, and be a servant. (Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves – Philippians 2:3)
Show love to others by continually beseeching God on their behalf. This doesn’t necessarily mean praying that God would up and heal all their infirmities (for that is not always for the best) but it does mean talking to God about others and petitioning for His will to be done in their lives. When people are sick, pray that their physical bodies would serve as a teacher for spiritual things…that through their sickness they might learn how to be more Heaven-minded. When people are going through trying times, pray that they might be strengthened with godly resolve to see through to the end. When people are peachy keen, pray that they would still continue to seek God in their days. Pray for the things that truly matter!

There is no need to say “if I only had a heart”. Practice love even when you don’t feel like it, and God will give you a heart.

A sound heart is the life of the flesh… – Proverbs 14:30a

3. He Will Give You The Nerve

It’s sad, believe me, missy, when you’re born to be a sissy…without the vim and verve. But I could show my prowess (be a lion, not a mowess) If I only had the nerve…

In The Wizard of Oz, the Lion wanted the nerve more than anything in the world. His search was a search for courage.

Wisdom, by necessity, brings forth love. Love, by necessity, brings forth courage. Godly love provokes us to be courageous.

The Cowardly Lion: Look at the circles under my eyes, I haven’t slept in weeks!
The Tin Woodsman: Why don’t you try counting sheep?
The Cowardly Lion: That doesn’t do any good, I’m afraid of them!

The Cowardly Lion has a problem many of us have: the fear of sheep. By sheep, I mean people (all we like sheep have gone astray – from Isaiah 53:6). The love of God causes us to be courageous, but the love of the world causes us to be afraid. Afraid of offending people…afraid of what others might think or do if we share the truth with them…afraid because a righteous life condemns those that we love who are living in sin. We must rise above our fears and do the right thing regardless.

Be of good courage, and let us behave ourselves valiantly for our people, and for the cities of our God: and let the Lord do that which is good in His sight. – 1 Chronicles 19:13

Dorothy Gale: Are you gonna stand around and let ’em fill us full of horror?
The Cowardly Lion: I’d like to roar ’em down, but I think I lost my roarer.

We can’t let fear paralyze us. The only way to gain courage is by facing the very fears that haunt us.

When stepping out in courageous teaching, it’s okay to start small. Yet it’s important to start, period! Are you afraid of public speaking? Face your fears by speaking in front of a small group of ladies, and then work your way up to a larger group! Are you afraid of talking one-on-one to others about God? Practice on children you come in contact with, and then work your way up to adults! Are you afraid of confronting someone about their sin? Write them a short (but heartfelt) letter and see how they respond.
(The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me. – Hebrews 13:6b)
Knowledge of God’s word helps us to be courageous about lifestyle changes. When people ask about the changes that you may be making in your life, being able to show that you are backed up in God’s word for your choices is going to strike far more confidence in you than saying “I just felt convicted”. Don’t be afraid to let God’s word have the final say! If that’s not “good enough” for your friends and family, it might be time to reevaluate the company you are keeping.
If you’re afraid of not being popular because you share truth, remember that in many ways Jesus was unpopular. His teachings grated against everything that the society around Him held dear. Naturally, this resulted in some serious backlash. Not much has changed over the years…the world still hates truth, and that’s not going to be changing. It’s time to decide whose side you want to be on come judgment day! (Marvel not, my brethren, if the world hate you. – 1 John 3:13)

There is no need to say “if I only had the nerve”. Step out in courage, and God will give you the nerve!

What makes a king out of a slave? Courage! – The Cowardly Lion

In conclusion…

At some point in our lives, we have all been in the place of the Scarecrow, the Tinman, and the Lion. We have all been hung up with no brain, rusted with no heart, and immobilized with no nerve. All have the same problem – they go nowhere. It is vital to have all three elements in our lives (brain, heart, nerve)…without one of these our whole character collapses. Without a brain, we may be kind and courageous…but have no wisdom on how to properly implement these qualities. Without a heart, we may be wise and courageous…but have no kindness to draw others to Christ. Without the nerve, we may be wise and kind…but never have the courage to reach out in the first place.

To become a woman that has all three qualities in spades, we must be certain we know where to look. With the Wonderful Wizard of Welkin, we can cut the cheap tricks and forget the phony man behind the curtain. With him, there are no gimmicks or false fronts. He is truly the answer to our problems.

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear [cowardly lion], but of power and of love [tinman] and of a sound mind [scarecrow]. – 2 Timothy 1:7

Let us press on to our very own “somewhere over the rainbow” (that is to say, Heaven)…for there truly is “no place like home”.

For God’s Glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

Mrs. Dustin Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

On Account of Angels

07.29.2017 by Chaste Bolks // 16 Comments

Angels…what do they truly look like? We all are a bit curious. Do they look like chubby, flying, naked babies as some have portrayed? Do they look like beautiful women with long, flowing locks of hair as another source might depict? Man has been trying to pinpoint the exact appearance of these ethereal beings for centuries. Halos, or no halos? Wings, or no wings? Male, or female? The questions regarding the appearance of angels seem never-ending. While these are all interesting things to ponder, I believe that by focusing on questions such as these, we are missing the real point. We should not be wondering so much “what do angels look like?” as we should be wondering “what do angels look like?!”…

What I mean is this: what can we learn about the character of angels…you know, what they look like beneath the surface? When it comes to our celestial comrades for Christ, halos and wings are the least of our worries. Believe it or not, angels should be playing a huge part in how we view our role as wives and mothers. Allow me to explain. I’m sure you have all read this verse from 1 Corinthians 11:3:b, 8-10:

The head of the woman is the man…for the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man. For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels.

“Because of the angels”…this phrase has long mystified many as to its intended meaning. No wonder, for it does seem rather vague and mysterious! What on earth do angels have to do with a woman having “power on her head”? Some have come to the conclusion that this portion of scripture is commanding females to wear a physical head-covering in worship; whereas others see it as an instruction to be sober in worship because the angels are looking in on us. Now I am not going to delve into either of these topics today…but I am convinced that there is much more to this phrase than meets the eye. Might I suggest that this passage is not so much a discourse on veils or our attitudes in corporate worship, as it is a red flag for the disobedient help meet. Let us hop over to Jude 6, and perhaps this bible riddle can be more clearly understood. It reads:

And the angels which kept not their first estate, but left their own habitation, he [God] hath reserved in everlasting chains under darkness unto the judgment of the great day.

Girls, are you making the connection here?! Remember, in 1 Corinthians 11, Paul exhorts us as women to keep our husbands as our head (God’s definition of female empowerment)…then he reminds us to do so “because of the angels”. Why? Because according to Jude 6, angels that do not keep their “estate” (their rightful place with God as their head) will receive condemnation to themselves! Therefore, when we as wives do not keep our “estate” (our rightful place with our husband as our head) we will likewise receive condemnation to ourselves.

In light of this powerful warning, we would do well to dwell on what makes an angel keep in good standing with the Father. Angels and wives have an absolutely identical role in regards to their submission (angels to God, wives to their husbands). Because of this, we are going to consider three celestial character traits that we as wives ought to continually emulate, on account of angels…

1. Angels Know Their Place

For unto the angels hath he [God] not put in subjection the world to come, whereof we speak…thou hast put all things in subjection under his [Christ’s] feet – Hebrews 2:5,8a (clarification added)

According to this passage, angels are not in a position of authority…Christ is. Every good angel understands this God-ordained hierarchy and unquestioningly submits to it. What would you think about an angel taking charge and trying to be equal with its master? Actually, there is a fascinating account in Revelation 12:7-9 about some dragon-following angels who tried this very thing…

And there was war in heaven: Michael and his angels fought against the dragon; and the dragon fought and his angels, and prevailed not; neither was their place found any more in heaven. And the great dragon was cast out, that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceiveth the whole world: he was cast out into the earth, and his angels were cast out with him.

This all sounds pretty foolish, doesn’t it? Why would mere angels attempt to prevail against the king? Didn’t they know they were going to ultimately fail? Yet we women can fall into the same folly when we forget our place under our husband’s authority. We need to remember that a wife trying to be equal to her husband and prevail against him is every bit as foolish as angels trying to be equal with God.

It was pride that changed angels into devils; it is humility that makes men as angels. – St. Augustine

These angels fell because they did not know their place. Instead of taking on an attitude of humble submission, they allowed themselves to be puffed up with pride. Of course we all know that “pride goeth before a fall”! This is why we are to have “power on our heads” (our husband leading us)! If we don’t, we will fall just like the angels of old did. We will lose everything if we will not stay in the position that the Lord designated for us.

Who is the final authority on hierarchy? God is. He and He alone gets the right to dictate who is in what position. Many women become infuriated when told to submit to their husbands, but who are they fighting against but the Lord Himself? Why can we not lay aside our pre-conceived, worldly notions, and simply admit that He knows best? Ponder the following three verses…

Surely your turning of things upside down shall be esteemed as the potter’s clay: for shall the work say of him that made it, He made me not? or shall the thing framed say of him that framed it, He had no understanding? – Isaiah 29:16

Woe unto him that striveth with his Maker! Let the potsherd strive with the potsherds of the earth. Shall the clay say to him that fashioneth it, What makest thou? or thy work, He hath no hands? – Isaiah 45:9

Then the word of the Lord came to me, saying, O house of Israel, cannot I do with you as this potter? saith the Lord. Behold, as the clay is in the potter’s hand, so are ye in mine hand.
– Jeremiah 18:5-6

How do these verses about clay apply to the angels, or to us as wives? Consider for a moment that if an angel chooses to fight against God, (or if a woman chooses to fight against her true nature of help meet and humble servant to her husband), it is as foolish as it would be for clay to rise up against the potter and demand to be made differently than the potter wills. It’s just plain silly. Our Lord made angels and women in such a way that is fitting and suitable…just right for us. Would we rise up in wickedness and pretend we know better than He? Or would we not rather say:

But now, O Lord, thou art our father; we are the clay, and thou art our potter; and we all are the work of thy hand. – Isaiah 64:8

If we are going to be true followers of God, it means we are going to follow Him in all things, even when it hurts. It means that we will allow ourselves to be completely subdued by our husbands, regardless of whether or not we want to…simply because God said to and that’s that. It means that we will stay in our designated position even if:

Our husbands are mean. Our husbands are unfair. Our husbands don’t pull their weight around the house. Our husbands have different child training techniques than us. Our husbands are selfish. Our husbands don’t love the Lord. Our husbands don’t love us. And so on, and so on, and so on.

Our King (whose blueprint for marriage is perfect) told us wives to submit to our husbands as unto the Lord (Ephesians 5:22) – and He didn’t offer an “unless”! In fact, He calls us to obey our husbands no matter how dastardly they might be. Consider that there is no greater sin than blaspheming the Holy Spirit (Mark 3:28-29). Yet what does God call the wife of such an unbeliever to do? Subject herself to her husband with a chaste and fearful attitude (1 Peter 3:1-2)! If God calls women to obey even a husband who is living in such sin as unbelief, then surely any other lesser excuse we can come up with will be rendered invalid.

It has nothing to do with whether you like God’s rules. It’s not your kingdom. If you want to operate by your own rules, then you need to go out and create your own world. But as long as you are in God’s world, where God has set the rules, you must abide by His rules or you become a rebel against His kingdom government. – Tony Evans

On Account of Angels, let every wife know her place.

2. Angels Show His Face

The angel of the Lord encampeth round about them that fear him, and delivereth them. O taste and see that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in Him. – Psalm 34:7-8

This verse really encompasses what it means to be a godly help meet. I want you to stop and think on who it is that is working in this passage, and who is the one getting the credit for that work. Is it not in fact the angel “doing all the work”? Therefore, the angel should receive the credit…right? Look at the verse again! It is not the angel getting the credit, but God who is regarded as good. This is because the angel is an unseen servant, working joyfully in the background with no need of thanks or recognition. Angels do many things for our well-being, but God is the One who gets the credit. Angels live to “show His face”! And that’s just the way it should be. Consider if a similar scenario would make you angry as a wife:

Lisa stayed up all night walking the halls, rocking her baby to sleep. Let it be known that Rick is a wonderful father…better could not be found within miles.

I can see the gritted teeth and hairs rising even now of “Lisa’s” the whole world over! “RICK is a wonderful father?! It was ME who stayed up all night, ME!! How dare he get the credit!!” Yet this is not the spirit of an angel of God, nor is it to be the spirit of a Christian wife.

Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven. Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly. – Matthew 6:1-4

I’ll let you in on a little secret: your reward for your labor is in your husband’s glory. Let me repeat that for you: YOUR reward for YOUR labor is in your HUSBAND’S glory. You might be calling me crazy, but hear me out. People will only recognize the state of your family by the success of your husband. He is the leader and poster boy of your home. It is not your place to receive glory for yourself, but to make him be glorified. Your thanks is knowing in your heart of hearts that you did your job and that you helped your husband to be regarded as a good man. Take joy in the fruit of your labors. When your husband delights in you, when the children are well-behaved and respectable, when the house is kept to a reasonable standard of neatness – this is your high-five from God. You have to be confident enough to take joy in this humble role without getting recognition. To the world this is crazy talk; yet as Christians we know that this is representing a perfect eternal portrait of Christ and His church.

We are all familiar with the famous chapter on the virtuous woman – Proverbs 31! Let us contemplate an interesting thought from verse 23. Who is the individual that is “known in the gates”? Not the virtuous woman, but her husband! Does it not seem odd that in the midst of a detailed description of the virtuous wife, a passage is randomly thrown in to describe her man? Yet this seemingly out of place text is not accidental. When a man is known, and has a glorious reputation…this sends a loud and clear message about what kind of wife he has. As a general rule, it says that he has a wife that is so humble and submissive in a behind-the-scenes sort of way, that by contrast he shines all the more brightly for the world to see. This is the same way that the angels are in regards to the Lord. Their primary goal is to make God known…to show his face. Not to be the one receiving the glory, but to be going about receiving glory for their king.

Contrast this godly attitude with that of the feminist movement:

I do not want to be the angel of any home: I want for myself what I want for other women, absolute equality. After that is secured, then men and women can take turns being angels. – Agnes Macphail

What Ms. Macphail fails to realize (pardon the pun), is that men and women were never meant to “take turns being angels”. What a perversion of truth! Such a mindset can only lead to discord in the family unit. When a wife tries to make herself equal with her husband (her human example of God in the flesh – Ephesians 5:22), is she not ultimately pulling the same wicked scheme as Satan did in times past? When Satan and his angels tried to become equal to God, they brought eternal damnation upon their own heads. May we never do the same by trying to become equal to our husbands.

Let no man beguile you of your reward in a voluntary humility and worshipping of angels, intruding into those things which he hath not seen, vainly puffed up by his fleshly mind, And not holding the Head, from which all the body by joints and and bands having nourishment ministered, and knit together, increaseth with the increase of God. – Colossians 2:18-19

There is a lot of “angel worship” going on in this world today: only it’s now evolved into the term “gender equality”. We see women trying to be men, wives trying to wear the pants in the home…yet wives were never meant to be elevated to the status of their husbands, just as angels were never meant to be elevated to the status of their God. This goes against the created design! Just as the aforementioned verse implies, our job is not to be the star of the show, but simply to “hold the Head”. Our modern society would have us believe that women should be exalted and revered like men. Yet consider how a true angel of God reacts to such nonsense…

And he [an angel] saith unto me [John], Write, Blessed are they which are called unto the marriage supper of the Lamb. And he saith unto me, These are the true sayings of God. And I fell at his feet to worship him. And he said unto me, See thou do it not: I am thy fellowservant, and of thy brethren that have the testimony of Jesus: worship God: for the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy. – Revelation 19:9-10

And I John saw these things, and heard them. And when I had heard and seen, I fell down to worship before the feet of the angel which shewed me these things. Then saith he unto me, See thou do it not: for I am thy fellowservant, and of thy brethren the prophets, and of them which keep the sayings of this book: worship God. – Revelation 22:8-9

Do these two closing words not send chills down your spine? Worship God. Oh, but if only this were the attitude of every wife towards her husband:”Don’t give me the credit….no, forbid that this should be! Here, it is solely my husband who deserves the adoration in our family. I am nought but his servant…give him the glory!” A meek and humble spirit such as this should be sought above all else. This is the primary goal of woman.

Does not every true man [or in our case, true woman] feel that he [she] is himself [herself] made higher by doing reverence to what is really above him [her]? – Thomas Carlyle (1841) [clarification mine]

Remember Hebrews 13:2:

Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.

Why do you think we might be unaware of an angel’s presence? Perhaps it is because they live to show God’s face…and not their own.

On Account of Angels, let every wife show her husband’s face.

3. Angels Grow His Race

For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways. – Psalm 91:11

In terms of hierarchy, humanity’s relationship with the Lord and His angels might be viewed somewhat like a business relationship. The Father might be regarded as a store’s general manager, the angels as shift leaders, and mankind as more generic crew members. God is the head honcho. The angels are higher than man, but ultimately answer to the Father like the rest of the team. Their job is to ensure that the crew members (us) are staying under the authority and headship of the Boss (Jehovah God). As women, this is how we should view our role of motherhood. We are given a charge over our children, but only according to the will of the main guy on deck (our husband).

We women really have to take care that we do not take such an ownership position over the area of child-rearing, that we forget that ultimately we are here to grow our husband’s race, not our own. Always keep the proper familial hierarchy in front of you:

[of Jesus…] Being made so much better than the angels, as he hath by inheritance obtained a more excellent name than they…But to which of the angels said he at any time, Sit on my right hand, until I make thine enemies thy footstool? Are they not all ministering spirits, sent forth to minister for them who shall be heirs of salvation? – Hebrews 1:4, 13-14

I find this verse interesting because it doesn’t only say Jesus is “better than the angels”, but rather “SO MUCH better than the angels”. Do we regard our husbands as “so much better” than us? Do our words, tone, body language, and actions make this clear on a daily basis? Are we teaching our children that Daddy is the king and wears the pants in the family, not Momma? Note that this verse says that angels are ministering spirits. Ministering spirits of what? God’s salvation – His message. They are not pushing their own agenda or trying to gain the favor of mankind for themselves. It should be the same way with mothers and their children. The world tells us that mothers are the alpha and omega of family life, and that fathers are incapable morons who know nothing of child-rearing. This is not the way it is in God’s family system! We mothers should be teaching our children above all else to venerate and obey their father, for this is training them to bow themselves to a sovereign God as adults.

Am I knocking motherhood? Am I saying it’s unimportant? Absolutely not! I am a mother myself, and I hold this role in high esteem. Yet I am convinced that it needs put in a proper perspective. Wives and mothers were never, ever meant to be the general managers of the home – this is the position belonging to fathers. We need to always remember that we are subject to our husbands just as our children are, only in a slightly higher position than they. Consider Psalm 8:4-5:

What is man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man, that thou visitest him? For thou hast made him a little lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honour.

You can see here that in keeping with the comparable hierarchy of [Husbands/Wives/Children] with [God/Angels/Man], our children are to be regarded as a little lower than Mother, but it should always be abundantly clear that both are under Father.

One way many women disrespect their husbands is by letting the children do things he would disapprove of when he is not around. This is such wicked behavior and teaches children little regard for authority. A mother should never overstep her husband’s will any more than a shift leader should overstep the will of a store’s general manager! This can only lead to confusion, rebellion, and chaos in the home (or outside of it, for that matter).We would do well to note that likewise, only God has authority over man – not even His angels:

But though we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed. – Galatians 1:8

We might think, “Caring for the children is my job! I spend the most time with them, I should choose how I want to rear them.” Yet in the spirit of Galatians 1:8, this argument does not hold any weight. Might we not rather say in similar fashion to the scripture…

If the children, or even myself as the mother in this home, persuade me to go against my husband’s instructions, I will completely ignore such folly.

Another way that many women misuse their role as mothers is by putting motherhood before marriage in her heart. Would it not be foolish for an angel to get so wrapped up in mankind that he forgets the Lord who placed humans under his charge in the first place? We would do well to remember that God calls us to be one with our husbands, not with our children. Now, do children need love, care and attention? Certainly “yes” on all accounts! However, this should never be to the neglect of the marital relationship. Husbands are to come first, and his needs above the needs of the children.

A man would not ignore his boss in order to take care of the other employees. If necessary, he would ignore the other employees under his authority in order to hear what his boss is saying and get new directions. – Debi Pearl, The Hidden Help Meet

Yet another way many women disrespect their husbands is by trying to control what he lets the children participate in. Perhaps the wife doesn’t approve of a certain tv show, or thinks a particular sport is too rough, or doesn’t want her child around a certain friend…the list goes on. Unless the child is in imminent danger of evil, the wife must relinquish her motherly worries over to the will of her husband. After all, he is the master of both mother and child. We must let him rule as he sees fit, without our nagging and criticism.

Who art thou [mother] that judgest another man’s [your husband’s] servant [his child]? to his own master [dad] he standeth or falleth. Yea, he shall be holden up: for God is able to make him stand. – Romans 14:4 (clarification added)

On Account of Angels, let every wife grow her husband’s race.

In conclusion…

Before you act, remember to only do so on account of the angels.

If you think: “I’m every bit as good as my husband, I deserve to be equal with him.”
Ask yourself: “What happened to the angels that held this opinion?”
Know your place!
If you think: “I want to be recognized for the work that I do. I don’t want my husband to get glory when I’m the one slaving away.”
Ask yourself: “Do the angels seek to show off, or to show off their God?”
Show His Face!
If you think: “Leave the parenting to me. I know more about raising kids than my husband does!”
Ask yourself: “Does an angel exercise its own will over mankind, or rather the will of its King?”
Grow His Race!

Bless the Lord, ye his angels, that excel in strength, that do his commandments, hearkening unto the voice of his word. Bless ye the Lord, all ye his hosts; ye ministers of his, that do his pleasures. – Psalm 103:20-21

The world calls such perfect submission and obedience weakness, but God calls it excelling in strength. Apply this verse to your life:

Bless your husband…for you are his wife. Excel in strength by letting go of bitterness when he hurts your feelings. Obey him even though he’s not perfect. Listen to him so that you can learn what he desires of his woman. Bless your husbands, all wives everywhere! You are to be a servant to your master! You were made to please your husband all the days of his life.

When all is said and done and this world has come to a close, you will receive your sure reward for your angelic obedience. And won’t it be good to enter into the kingdom of our beloved King who can then say of us:

By Jupiter, an angel! or, if not, An earthly paragon! – William Shakespeare, Cymbeline

For God’s Glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

Mrs. Dustin Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.