He dreamed of a glunk with a horrible face
And thought he’d better hide someplace.
He tried to hide between the sheets
And found an ogre with two left feet.
He tried to hide in the dresser drawer
And heard a hungry tiger roar.
He tried to hide beneath the bed
And found a body without a head.
He tried to hide behind the door
And heard a sleeping monster snore.
He tried to hide down in the basement
And found a dragon to his amazement.
He tried to hide beneath the stair
And found a mummy grinnin’ there.
He tried to hide behind the drapes
And found a dozen hairy apes.
He tried to hide behind a dresser
And found a murderin’ mad professor.
He tried to hide in a pile of clothes
And found a witch with a warty nose.
He tried to hide under the sink
And found a vampire takin’ a drink.
He tried to hide in the garbage pail
And found a werewolf sharpenin’ his nails.
So he went back to bed, that’s what he did,
And he dreamed of tomorrow,
And there he hid.

– “He Tried To Hide” by Shel Silverstein

We all know the fear of waking from a terrifying nightmare as a child. In the dead of night, during a deep sleep, all the monsters, haunts, spooks, ghouls, and glunks alike came out to play with your mind. If you were like me, you probably went through all the motions of pulling your covers up over your head (only to realize you couldn’t breathe and had to venture back out), turning your lamp on (only to find eerie shadows dancing on the wall), tossing, turning, praying, crying, and trying to think of anything but scary things! Yet, like in the poem, everywhere you turned, more frightening prospects kept popping up, until you eventually got so sleepy that you let sleep overtake you and bring you safely over to the morning light. Once you awoke you probably only faintly remembered the fear of hours ago, because there is something healing about the light of a new day that tends to wipe away the glunks and ghouls of yesterday.

In like manner, wrongs are a lot like glunks and ghouls. When a Christian sins against someone, whether in word or deed, it haunts them. Everywhere they turn, they are confronted with the wrong until they rectify it. They can turn from it, hide from it, try to forget about it, try to think about something else, try to shed a little artificial light on the issue…but when all is said and done, the only thing that will bring peace and healing is “the true light, which lighteth every man that cometh into the world” (John 1:9). The physical light of day can not wipe away sins like it seems to wipe away childish fears. However, the spiritual light of Jesus Christ works through our repentance and rectification to wipe away our wrongs.

Are you guilty of speaking out of turn to your husband? Have you been too harsh towards your son or daughter? Did you ever roll your eyes at your father or mother? How about spilled a friend’s secret? Taken an attitude with the waiter? Given that overbearing family member a piece of your mind? Honked rudely at the car in front of you? Yelled when you should have held your peace? Held your ground when you should have budged? Talked when you should have listened? Left when you should have stayed?

In all truth, who hasn’t been guilty of one or more of these shameful actions? Each of us can be so wicked when we lose sight of our Lord and His call for us to be holy people. It’s true that we all fail at times, but here’s the most important thing: do we make it right? Do we sweep it under the rug like yesterday’s nightmare, or do we do all in our power to make amends with the person we have wronged? Do we avoid, or do we face our fears and apologize?

Sometimes it seems that apologizing is a lost art. Rather than apologize, it’s easier to hide away (and hope the other person forgets about it), or even make excuses for our bad behavior! It’s not easy to humble ourselves and admit we messed up – not even to ourselves, but especially not to someone else. We’d rather pull the proverbial “cover” over our heads and hide from the “monster” that dealing with a confrontational situation appears to be.

While monsters aren’t a reality of life, confrontation is. Apologizing when we’ve sinned against someone isn’t easy, but it doesn’t have to be terrifying. Today we are going to learn three vital tips in giving An Appropriate Apology. Once you implement these three steps into your life, you will be able to face your fears, strengthen your relationships, and rest in the true healing light of tomorrow…

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#1. Be Swift

An appropriate apology is swift. A truly apologetic person will not put off until tomorrow what they should do today.

Owe someone an apology? No more hiding, no more procrastinating, no more waiting for that perfect moment that never comes! Delayed apologies encourage bitterness to grow within the other party, and pride to grow within us. Delayed apologies strain fellowship.

Amos 3:3 poses this question: Can two walk together except they be agreed?

One aspect of “agreeing” is to be in fellowship one with another. When one person withholds an apology that another is due, they hinder this fellowship. We are commanded in Hebrews 3:13 to “exhort one another daily, while it is called today“. Can you hear the urgency in the words? The Hebrews writer is saying, “there’s no time like the present! No time to fool around, today is the day for unity!” How can we accomplish this when we’re not even getting along?

Not only do we lose fellowship one with another when we withhold apologies, but we lose fellowship with God. Jesus paints this picture very pointedly in Matthew 5:21-24. I encourage you to read it for yourself, but I will also give a brief recap of His teaching here:

Under the Old Covenant, we learned the commandment, “thou shalt not kill”…but Jesus takes it a step further. If we are getting ticked at our brother or sister in Christ (this can include our own household) without a good reason, watch out – we just may be in hot water with the Lord. Perhaps we lose our cool and call them worthless…this won’t be overlooked on judgment day. Maybe we even tell them they’re a fool…this kind of behavior is worthy of Hell. We shouldn’t think we can delay an apology and keep on going on with life, worshipping the Lord, assembling with the church, etc. None of this is worth a dime if we don’t get our act in gear and go make it right with the other person first. Our worship is vain until we give an appropriate apology.

Many take Matthew 5:21-24 and use it to teach that it is a sin to say the word “fool”. While it is true that Christians should have clean speech, this narrow scope is limiting the true spirit of the passage. Don’t miss the overlying principles at hand…love one another, control your temper, don’t speak out of turn, and when you do fail…apologize swiftly and return into fellowship with God and your brother.

Apologize quickly when you wrong someone, because ‘I’m sorry’ has no value in the grave. – Lakesha Ruise

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#2. Be Sympathetic

An appropriate apology is sympathetic. A truly apologetic person will have compassion for the person they have wronged.

One of our founding fathers, Benjamin Franklin, once said:

Never ruin an apology with an excuse.

How right he was! There’s little worse than receiving an apology where the one apologizing justifies the hurt they caused. “I’m sorry, but…” This sort of apology reeks of pride and certainly doesn’t seem repentant whatsoever. An apology such as this can even be the springboard for further disagreement! When we apologize, we don’t want to come across as a know-it-all. We want to be genuine, understanding, and humble.

To him that is afflicted pity should be shewed from his friend. – Job 6:14a

Usually when we think of “affliction” we think of physical pain, yet we should also show pity (sympathy) to those who have an affliction of the heart or emotions. How much more so if we were the cause of that affliction?! This stands true even if we think the other person is overreacting, or even if we didn’t mean to make them upset. It is not our responsibility to determine whether or not their hurt is valid, but it is our responsibility to do our part to alleviate any hurt we have caused.

Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous… – 1 Peter 3:8

When you apologize, you have to remember that it isn’t all about you. It’s not about making yourself look good, or proving a point. It’s an act of humility…it’s showing the other person that you care more about the relationship you share than you care about “having the last word”. It’s acknowledging that you messed up, and you want a fresh start. It’s saying, “I can’t turn back time, but I can tend your wounds. Show me where it hurts so I can bandage up the painful spots I inflicted.” Try to see the situation through the other person’s eyes. Sympathy goes a long way in patching up problems.

A stiff apology is a second insult…the injured party does not want to be compensated because he has been wronged; he wants to be healed because he has been hurt. – Gilbert K. Chesterton

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#3. Be Sincere

An appropriate apology is sincere. A truly apologetic person speaks the truth…not just what others want to hear.

Sincerity may seem to be the most obvious trait of an apology, but it’s definitely not the most common. Too many times apologies are made with the wrong intentions. Maybe an apology is expected, or it just seems like the right thing to do. Maybe we apologize because we want to put the issue behind us without resolving it in our heart. Maybe we want the other person to stop pointing fingers, so we give in and tell them what they want to hear. Maybe we want to look good to others, or maybe we even want to pull the wool over someone’s eyes so that we can prepare for round two of stabbing them in the back. Whatever the case may be, an apology that is not sincere is nothing short of a lie. Better to not apologize at all than to fake an apology…

Whose hatred is covered by deceit, his wickedness shall be shewed before the whole congregation. Whoso diggeth a pit shall fall therein: and he that rolleth a stone, it will return upon him. A lying tongue hateth those that are afflicted by it; and a flattering mouth worketh ruin. – Proverbs 26:26-28

If we try to cover wrong intentions with a fake apology, the outcome does not look good for us. We might think we’re clever and in control of the situation when we “cover our hatred with deceit”. However, “nothing is secret, that shall not be made manifest” (Luke 8:17a). In short, you can’t be a fraud with God. If you can’t muster up any sincere feelings of regret over wronging someone…pray! Ask the Lord to soften your heart and convict you so that you can make things right in a truthful manner. First, apologize in your heart…then go find the person you’ve wronged as soon as possible and make amends.

There’s a world of difference between merely saying sorry, and being sorry. When giving an apology, we may need to take a little time beforehand to test our sincerity. We need to ask ourselves just what it is that we’re sorry about. “Have I sinned?”…”Have I hurt someone’s feelings?”…”Have I caused a misunderstanding?”…what exactly is the problem at hand? If we can’t pin down exactly why we’re apologizing, we have no business apologizing until we figure it out. Generic apologies lack sincerity. Remember to always say what you mean, and mean what you say…and above all, know that actions speak louder than words. Don’t say it if you can’t show it.

But sorry is the Kool-Aid of human emotions. True sorrow is as rare as true love. – Stephen King

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In conclusion…

We all have to say we’re sorry at some point in time. We fail…we let our emotions get out of control, we hurt each other, we say things we shouldn’t say, and we do things we shouldn’t do. We are out of line more times than we care to admit, and we must keep humbling ourselves and asking for forgiveness again and again. We shouldn’t be afraid of saying we’re sorry. We shouldn’t run from it. We shouldn’t blow it off. . However, we must all remember that at the end of the day, “sorry” is just another word…easily said and easily forgotten. To test whether our apology is appropriate, we must always ask ourselves these three questions…

• Is my apology swift?
• Is my apology sympathetic?
• Is my apology sincere?

It is then that you will know that you have an appropriate apology; an apology that can open the curtains to a brand new day, to let in the healing light of tomorrow.

For I will declare mine iniquity; I will be sorry for my sin. – Psalm 38:18

For God’s Glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

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Mrs. Dustin Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

If you think you are beaten, you are;
If you think you dare not, you don’t.
If you’d like to win, but you think you can’t,
It is almost a certain – you won’t.

If you think you’ll lose, you’ve lost;
For out in this world we find
Success begins with a fellow’s will
It’s all in the state of mind.

If you think you’re outclassed, you are;
You’ve got to think high to rise.
You’ve got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win the prize.

Life’s battles don’t always go
To the stronger or faster man;
But sooner or later the man who wins
Is the one who thinks he can!

– Walter D. Wintle

As anyone who battles with anxiety or depression can tell you, feeling like a failure is that subtle prompt which triggers the downward spiral leading to dark days. First come the desolate feelings of guilt and shame…then the negative thoughts of self-reproach creep in…until finally, the festering failure has attached itself to your psyche so wholly that you utterly crumble under the weight of it all. Then the dark days come; those days where it seems that not the smallest ray of sunshine can reach into your soul, that not one word from your mouth can reach the ears of the Creator, that you are untouchable, unreachable, unlovable. The words of the prophet are fitting:

The whole head is sick, and the whole heart faint. From the sole of the foot even unto the head there is no soundness in it… – Isaiah 1:5b-6a

Is this how Christians are meant to live…drowning in the depths of despair? Of course not. This mindset is absolutely contrary to Christian virtues such as joy, hope, and peace. To be sick in the head, faint in the heart, and altogether unsound is no way to get on in life. Yet many of us (even those who have been redeemed) fall into this mindset from time to time. For those of us who lean towards self-deprecating moods, it is a constant struggle to stay above water. However, it can be done, if we are diligent.

As our poet, Walter D. Wintle, noted previously; a sound mind that is free of self-reproach is absolutely crucial to success. This is true not only in a worldly sense, but ever so much more in a spiritual sense. Our Lord calls us to come out of the festering failure mindset and into a Christlike mindset “of power, and of love, and of a sound mind”. (2 Timothy 1:7)  This seems nigh to impossible during our dark days, but it is for this reason that we must be proactive rather than reactive. We must put a stop to the dark days before they begin.

How do we do perform such a feat? We have to start with our thoughts.

A great flaw of the human nature is a bend to be led by feelings. While feelings are important and can even be a blessing in their rightful place, they are never to be the captain of our soul’s ship. Too many times we let feelings take the wheel, when it ought to be our Spirit-fed thoughts steering us in the right direction. We must filter each feeling we have through the lens of God’s truth. When those feelings of festering failure come creeping in, we have a choice in how we deal with them. We can give in to the feelings, and let ourselves sink in to the miry pit of self-loathing and depression…OR…we can ask ourselves the following questions:

1.  Are my feelings of festering failure well-founded? Is the guilt I am struggling with valid? Should I feel ashamed and lowly right now? Is there a sin of which I need to repent that God is convicting me of?
   or…
2. Is this just Satan trying to get in my head and separate me from the love of God and hinder my spiritual growth?

There are two different kinds of guilt. One comes from Heaven, but the other is a mere counterfeit from Hell…festering failure. It’s very important to know which we are being confronted with when negative feelings arise. Today we will learn to identify these two different types of guilt…

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First we will consider the authentic guilt from Heaven…the guilt that grows.

This guilt is the chastening rod of the Lord. It is a call to action. It is a warning. It is a “shape up or ship out” wake up call.

The guilt that grows takes root not in a conscience which has been “seared by a hot iron” (1 Timothy 4:2); but rather, in a conscience that longs to be “void of offence toward God, and toward men” (Acts 24:16).  This variety of guilt is healthy and motivating! Many times, guilt is just what we need to wake up and see the error in our ways. It nags at us until we are compelled to repent and recover a pure conscience toward the Lord once again. It is a vital step in redemption, for without guilt we have little ability to acknowledge our sinful condition in the first place.

Those of the world try to avoid any form of guilt, healthy or otherwise. “Live life with no regrets!” they say, “don’t ever feel ashamed for being yourself!” Admittedly, it is more comfortable and convenient to bury our heads in the sand when guilty feelings arise then to deal with the problem then and there. However, we can only hide the truth for so long, and we can “be sure our sin will find us out” (Numbers 32:23). It’s always better to deal with sin before we have to, if you catch my drift. Jehovah God can deal with our sin, or we can straighten up swiftly so He doesn’t have to come down hard on us. The choice is ours.

If we have sinned, we needn’t be afraid to let the guilt that grows have its way with us. Growing can indeed be a painful process in the moment, but the eternal results far exceed the temporary discomfort…

Sorrow is better than laughter: for by the sadness of the countenance the heart is made better. – Ecclesiastes 7:3

We are never to avoid the guilt that grows, but are to accept it is as a learning experience and allow it to make our hearts better.

To keep on trying in spite of disappointment and failure is the only way to keep young and brave. Failures become victories if they make us wise-hearted. – Helen Keller

We won’t linger long in this section, because our main focus today is not on the positive side of guilt, but on the negative side. Today our primary aim is to expose the counterfeit guilt from Hell: festering failure.

• Do you ever feel like a worthless loser, but you just don’t know why?
• Are you ever plagued by a guilty conscience even after you have repented of past transgressions?
• Ever lie awake at night and replay all your mistakes over and over (not sins, mind you – but merely innocent mistakes)?

If this resonates with you, then it sounds to me like you have…

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Now we will consider the counterfeit guilt from Hell…the guilt that goes.

Has festering failure gotten its grip on you? Yes? No? Not sure what to say? How can you tell if your guilt is authentic or counterfeit? Here is an important rule of thumb to remember: if it’s not the guilt that grows, then it’s the guilt that goes! If your guilt is serving to keep you down instead of lift you up, you can be assured that Satan is getting inside of your head.

I’ve got a bad case of the 3:00 am guilts – you know, when you lie in bed awake and replay all those things you didn’t do right? Because, as we all know, nothing solves insomnia like a nice warm glass of regret, depression, and self-loathing. – D.D. Barant, Dying Bites (The Bloodhound Files, #1)

Guilt that grows says: “I am ashamed that I ____. I will ask the Lord for forgiveness and choose right from now on.”
Guilt that goes says: “I do everything wrong! I am such a loser, always messing up. I’ll just never do the right thing!”

Guilt that grows says: “I spoke out of turn to that person. Shame on me. I will go talk to them and apologize for my behavior.”
Guilt that goes says: “I can’t believe what I said. What a fool! I’m so embarrassed; I never want to see that person again.”

Guilt that grows says: “I’ve been slacking off in my spiritual life lately. I need to get back on track. Time to get to studying right now!”
Guilt that goes says: “I am good for nothing. God could never accept my pathetic efforts, so why even bother? He probably hates me!”

Do you see how the guilt that grows compels you to action, while the guilt that goes only leaves you depressed and despairing? Satan takes a truth (i.e: you messed up) and embellishes it with lies (i.e: you are a complete failure and always will be). Don’t listen to him, friends. When Satan’s festering failure tries to enter your psyche: “gird up the loins of your mind” (1 Peter 1:13a) 

Proverbs 14:15 tell us: The simple believeth every word: but the prudent man looketh well to his going.

In other words, make sure that there is no sin in your life that you are overlooking, but don’t buy into Satan’s outlandish accusations either. Find a healthy balance. There will be times in all of our lives that we will inevitably mess up, there’s no doubt about it. If this were untrue, we would have no need of a Savior! Christians are not known by our perfection, but we are known by our direction. Do we walk in sin, or do we walk in Spirit? Do we condone our sins, or do we confess them? Do we love the bad choices we’ve made, or do we loathe them? The answer to these questions are what make all the difference.

Lay not wait, O wicked man, against the dwelling of the righteous; spoil not his resting place: for a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again: but the wicked shall fall into mischief. – Proverbs 24:15-16

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the Lord upholdeth him with his hand. – Psalm 37:23-24

If and when you do fall, get right back up again, repent, and move on. Don’t let Satan convince you that you have no ability to do so. This variety of guilt has no ability to grow, so it needs to go. As we looked at previously, the heavenly kind of guilt that grows is the kind that convicts us of sin and brings us up out of the mire. The guilt that goes on the other hand, is nothing more than that hellish festering failure…Satan’s attempt to keep us in the mire of our sin by bogging us down with self-defeat. This vicious cycle is not a help, but a hindrance…

Chronic remorse, as all the moralists are agreed, is a most undesirable sentiment. If you have behaved badly, repent, make what amends you can and address yourself to the task of behaving better next time. On no account brood over your wrongdoing. Rolling in the muck is not the best way of getting clean. – Aldous Huxley, Brave New World

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In conclusion…

Guilt may be right around the bend for any one of us. It might come today, tomorrow, next week, or next month…but it will come. Guilt is a reality this side of heaven for those with a working conscience. We all have our guilt, and as I’ve said before, it’s not always a bad thing. However, are we prepared when it is? Are we prepared to identify that counterfeit guilt from Hell and say “I will have no part in Satan’s lies”? Are we prepared to see our guilt for what it is and either let it grow or let it go?

For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death. – 2 Corinthians 7:10

The godly sorrow is the guilt that grows – “working repentance to salvation” inside of us.
The sorrow of the world is the guilt that goes – “working death” inside of us.
Which kind of guilt will you allow to be at “work” in your life?

There are two kinds of guilt: the kind that drowns you until you’re useless, and the kind that fires your soul to purpose. – Sabaa Tahir, An Ember in the Ashes (An Ember in the Ashes, #1)

Friends, be careful not to let festering failure creep into your heart and steal your purpose. Satan can and will use this guilt from his handy bag of tricks to keep you separated from God. Don’t give him the pleasure! Next time guilty feelings arise in you, remind yourself of this: “If it’s not the guilt that grows, it’s the guilt that goes!”

For God’s Glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

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Mrs. Dustin Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

Hungry Mungry sat at supper,
Took his knife and spoon and fork,
Ate a bowl of mushroom soup, ate a slice of roasted pork,
Ate a dozen stewed tomatoes, twenty-seven deviled eggs,
Fifteen shrimps, nine baked potatoes,
Thirty-two fried chicken legs,
A shank of lamb, a boiled ham,
Two bowls of grits, some black-eye peas,
Four chocolate shakes, eight angel cakes,
Nine custard pies with Muenster cheese,
Ten pots of tea, and after he,
Had eaten all that he was able,
He poured some broth on the tablecloth
And ate the kitchen table.

His parents said, “Oh Hungry Mungry, stop these silly jokes.”
Mungry opened up his mouth, and “Gulp,” he ate his folks.
And then he went and ate his house, all the bricks and wood,
And then he ate up all the people in the neighborhood.
Up came twenty angry policemen shouting, “Stop and cease.”
Mungry opened his mouth and “Gulp,” he ate the police.
Soldiers came with tanks and guns.
Said Mungry, “They can’t harm me.”
He just smiled and licked his lips and ate the U.S. Army.

The President sent all his bombers – Mungry still was calm,
Put his head back, gulped the planes, and gobbled up the bomb.
He ate his town and ate the city – ate and ate and –
And then he said, “I think I’ll eat the whole United States.”

And so he ate Chicago first and munched the Water Tower,
And then he chewed on Pittsburgh but he found it rather sour.
He ate New York and Tennessee, and all of Boston town,
Then drank the Mississippi River just to wash it down.
And when he’d eaten every state, each puppy, boy and girl
He wiped his mouth upon his sleeve and went to eat the world.

He ate the Egypt pyramids and every church in Rome,
And all the grass in Africa and all the ice in Nome.
He ate each hill in green Brazil and then to make things worse
He decided for dessert he’d eat the universe.

He started with the moon and stars and soon as he was done
He gulped the clouds, he sipped the wind and gobbled up the sun.
Then sitting there in the cold dark air,
He started to nibble his feet,
Then his legs, then his hips
Then his neck, then his lips
Till he sat there just gnashin’ his teeth
‘Cause nothin’ was nothin’ was
Nothin’ was nothin’ was
Nothin’ was left to eat.

– “Hungry Mungry” by Shel Silverstein

Gluttony. As was the case with Hungry Mungry, you might say “round and round and round it goes, and where it stops nobody knows!” Gluttony…it’s the sin so many want to joke about, but so few want to talk about. It’s the skeleton in the closet. A guilty pleasure. A secret sin.

…and it’s our topic for today.

Gluttony is one of those oft “swept under the rug” kind of sins. I believe this is, in part, due to the lack of clear cut biblical standards on the issue. Most everyone knows it is wrong to “overeat”…but what on earth does “overeating” even look like? How do you know when you’ve crossed the line? Can gluttony be measured?

One person might think eating more than one hamburger per sitting is wrong, another might think eating five hamburgers is alright. One person eats dessert once a week, another eats it three times a day. One believes that drinking pop is to be avoided, another cracks open a fresh can at every meal. Everyone has a different opinion about how much is too much.

So, who is right?! From what source can we get our standard?

Rather than getting caught up in opinions, we are to look to the Bible for our answers! Here’s where it gets tricky, though: the Bible speaks of gluttony in terms of principles rather than precepts. To the best of my knowledge, you will not be able to find a portion control chart in scripture to definitively define your eating habits! Just the same, God’s word is not altogether silent on the subject. He has given us all we need to monitor our leanings toward gluttony. (If we will only apply a little common sense!)

Today we will ponder three punishments that might show up in our lives as a sign of excessive eating habits. If one or more of these signs has shown up in your life, it may be time to make some changes…

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The first sign of gluttony is a punishment of the body: the punishment of pudginess.

Let’s be honest…one of the first places gluttony shows up is inside our own skin. When we’re no longer growing up, but continuing to grow out, it’s nearly always a tell-tale sign that we’re consuming far more than our body needs for nourishment.

Now don’t get me wrong: I’m not advocating an obsession with numbers on a scale, or making oneself sick to fit into a certain size. What I am advocating is proper education on what is a reasonable and healthy weight for YOU. This will of course vary with height, age, bone structure, muscle mass, etc. It’s not so much the number on the scale as it is maintaining a proportionate size for your unique combination of the above factors. If you are unsure where you should be weight-wise, an experienced medical health professional can help locate the appropriate parameters you ought to stay in. When you find yourself pushing the limit, taking a serious spiritual look at your eating habits will most likely get you right back on track.

Food is a lot like sex. Sex, in the right context (marriage) is a gift of God intended for pleasure and the bringing forth of new life. Food, in the right context (portioned) is a gift of God intended for pleasure and the sustaining of life. Sex outside of the covenant of marriage is crude, unacceptable, and shameful. Food outside of the boundaries of a self-controlled appetite is also crude, unacceptable, and shameful. Food and sex are wonderful gifts if used properly…but repulsive stumbling blocks when they are not.

There is a difference between eating and drinking for strength and from mere gluttony. – Henry David Thoreau

We must be careful how we view and use food. Food is not only a necessary nourishment, but can also be a tantalizing temptation. Weight watching can quickly fly out the window in its presence if we are not careful. The last thing anybody wants to think about at mealtime is counting the cost, but this is exactly what the God Who created pleasurable sustenance calls us to do!

Consider the words of the Psalmist in praise to our Lord:

He causeth the grass to grow for the cattle, and herb for the service of man: that he may bring forth food out of the earth; And wine that maketh glad the heart of man, and oil to make his face shine, and bread which strengtheneth man’s heart. – Psalm 104:14-15

In this Psalm, we find that God created food and beverage with three focuses in mind: 1. Our Pleasure; 2. Our Health; and 3. Our Strength.

In our Lord’s great kindness to us, He inspired this “sweet” little passage as well:

My son, eat thou honey, because it is good; and the honeycomb, which is sweet to thy taste. – Proverbs 24:13

From these two passages above, we get the distinct sense that our loving Father delights in giving us tasty food to enjoy. He did not only create food for our survival, but He wanted us to find satisfaction in our daily meals.

However, there is a limit to how much satisfaction we ought to find in food. Consider these two proverbs about honey in conjunction with the previous one above:

Hast thou found honey? Eat so much as is sufficient for thee, lest thou be filled therewith, and vomit it. – Proverbs 25:16

It is not good to eat much honey: so for men to search their own glory is not glory. He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls. – Proverbs 25:27-28

Allow me to point out a few basic truths found in the first of these two scriptures. First of all, I will have you note that honey is a treat, not a necessity. This ought to remind us that food is a gift for our pleasure…our God is kind. Another point to be mindful of, is that there is no set number of ounces mentioned for the honey…but rather, a warning to control our portions. Why? If we eat too much, we will become full and “vomit” it. In other words, there is a somber truth when it comes to overeating: enjoy now, pay later.

In the second of these two passages, we see the comparison between overeating and pride. They both involve a sore lack of self-control. Overeating feeds the flesh, while pride feeds the ego…but they both feed the sin in our hearts…selfishness. The self-centered mindset leaves our spirit in shambles like a demolished city left to ruin. This is why we as christians are called to die to self.

There is much punishment to be had in pudginess. At first, a few extra pounds may not seem to make much difference, yet an expanding girth speaks volumes of an expanding sin problem. In the case of pudginess:

Gluttony is not a secret vice. – Orson Welles

It’s right there for all to see! How embarrassing to have “self” hanging over our jeans, jiggling from our arms, and rippling up our backs! Would we not be wise to look in the mirror and recognize the visible chastisement of the Lord? “Turn back, Child”, He warns…”Self is eating you alive!” Can you see the warning signs?

• The huff and puff while climbing a flight of stairs? The punishment of pudginess.

• The inability to participate in (physical) recreational activity with others? The punishment of pudginess.

• The old outfits at the back of the closet, long outgrown? The punishment of pudginess.

• The fear to be seen in naked vulnerability by your own spouse? The punishment of pudginess.

• The heart problem the doctors never seem to be able to fix? The punishment of pudginess!

Any such example should serve as a warning that “self” is taking over, and that we have pleasured our flesh far too much.

So, how do we avoid pudginess? How can we know the right amount of food to fuel our body? How can we avoid gluttonous eating habits?

I can’t tell you how many calories a day you may consume. Neither can I tell you how many cookies you may have for a snack. If the Lord Almighty did not set in place such definitive numbers in His word, neither will I presume to do so. However, I will give you a few tips that may help you to self-evaluate, and put things in perspective. When headed for the pantry, you might ask yourself the following:

• Am I eating to live, or living to eat?

• Am I consuming food, or is food consuming me?

• Does my spirit control my appetite, or does my appetite control my spirit?

These questions point at the heart rather than the hamburgers. The goal is getting down to the heart of the matter, after all. If you evaluate and find yourself lacking in self-control, now is the time to repent. By denying the flesh now, you will be saving yourself from the pain of punishment later.

There are many simple tricks for taking control and managing your own weight…

• In our age of high-technology, there is no end to the various apps that make it possible to easily track your eating habits and set boundaries. Try downloading one for free! You just might find that keeping records motivates you to do better today than yesterday!

• Another easy yet effective tool is self-talk for limitation. You tell yourself (for example): “I am going to eat two cookies for a snack this evening.” Then, you stay true to the words you spoke to yourself. Do not eat three cookies, do not eat two-and-a-half cookies…simply eat the amount you decided to eat – allow yourself no more. Several days of doing this and you have created a habit!

• One trick I have learned is to always save more indulgent snacks until the evening. Here is why: Let’s say I eat a slice of cake in the early afternoon. It is all I intend to snack on, but by evening, I am wishing I had another slice. My flesh would like to justify eating more. Slyly, my flesh says, “it has been a few hours ago since your last slice after all. Another sliver couldn’t hurt”. If I cater to my flesh, I have now foolishly eaten two slices of cake, when my original intent was to eat only one! However, if I refrain from eating any cake altogether until after supper, I have something to look forward to and I only eat one slice throughout the day. This leaves no provision for my flesh, and I remain in control.

Such simple tips as these can make a world of difference! Bottom line: set your own weight management goals, and stick to them. It only gets easier the more you do. It may not seem all that important to stick to goals that we make personally, but we must ask ourselves this: “if I can’t even stay true to myself, who can I stay true to?”

Don’t be a glutton for punishment. Flee from pudginess!

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The second sign of gluttony is a punishment of the soul: the punishment of poverty.

If we are honest with ourselves, we can’t help but acknowledge that it costs more to eat more. A gluttonous grocery bill is not cheap.

Listen to these stark warnings from the book of Proverbs:

He that loveth pleasure shall be a poor man: he that loveth wine and oil shall not be rich. – Proverbs 21:17

There is treasure to be desired and oil in the dwelling of the wise; but a foolish man spendeth it all up. – Proverbs 21:20

There is no room for doubt – a gluttonous person is going to be (more often than not) a poor person. They nickel and dime their money away on that satisfaction which is short lived…

You get no thanks from your belly — it always forgets what you’ve done for it and comes begging again the next day. – Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn 

You might be thin as a rail (for gluttony does not always manifest itself in the physical body), but how’s your budget? Are you perhaps spending too much in the way of meals? A glutton may dig themselves into a financial hole just as well as a chain-smoker or a drunk would. There is more of a correlation than you might think…

Be not among winebibbers; among riotous eaters of flesh: For the drunkard and the glutton shall come to poverty: and drowsiness shall clothe a man with rags. – Proverbs 23:20-21

Drunkards and gluttons are in many ways two of a kind. They both are poor financially and spiritually. Also, take special note of the mention above of “drowsiness”. Hmm…food hangover, anyone? Think about it…eating too much usually makes you tired, sluggish, and irritable. It’s a terrible feeling, and it’s another form of punishment with a capital P!

It is the just doom of laziness and gluttony to be inactive without ease and drowsy without tranquility. – Samuel Johnson

To return to my original point, can you see signs of gluttony in your food bill?

• The unexpected stop at the fast food chain, because “it sounded good”.

• The candy bar you “couldn’t resist” while passing through the checkout lane.

• The cheese puffs you threw in your cart, because “a sudden, intense craving” came on.

Understand that I don’t mean to say any of these things are bad in and of themselves…in moderation. However, if this is the norm in your life or something that controls you “in the moment”, you may not be giving yourself a treat; you may be giving in to gluttony.

To be blessed and yet permit gluttony to blind me to the blessings is to banish myself to a life of unrelenting poverty even though I might be utterly engulfed in the embrace of a million marvelous blessings. – Craig D. Lounsbrough

Here are some tips that may help curb gluttonous spending habits…

• When grocery shopping, prepare one hundred percent of your list beforehand, and stick to it. Don’t be swayed by items you “didn’t know you needed”. If you didn’t know you needed it, chances are…you didn’t need it, period!

• Meal plan, meal plan, meal plan! Try to avoid unexpected restaurant excursions, and save those occasions for times when they are planned and can be afforded.

• Decide a set amount to spend on food for the week, and do not exceed the budget. Get cash out of the bank if you need to, and use that primarily (rather than a card). When you limit yourself to a strict cash flow each grocery day/restaurant excursion, it can help you evaluate whether you truly need all the extra “goodies” or not.

Don’t be a glutton for punishment. Flee from poverty!

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The third sign of gluttony is a punishment of the spirit: the punishment of preoccupation.

When we are preoccupied with food, it leaves little room to dwell on other things. Higher things. Spiritual things. Rather than redeeming our time for the Lord, all we can think about is heading to the pantry to rummage more goodies for the flesh. How carnal! How shameful. If, on the other hand, we free our minds from the lust of food, we will have room for more productivity and spiritual growth.

Preoccupation with food is not only gluttony, but it is a form of idolatry! It is a mindset of “food now, God some other time“…

• Ever wish the preacher would stop sermonizing so you could race to the dinner table to feed your belly?

• Ever think about what you will make for supper during the last song in worship service?

• Ever write a christian article and keep getting up to grab yourself snacks instead of focusing?

If these sound familiar, you might be suffering from the punishment of preoccupation, my friend! Stop now before you end up counted among these folks…

Whose end is destruction, whose god is their belly, and whose glory is in their shame, who mind earthly things. – Philippians 3:19

Gluttony is often joked about in social circles, but as you can see – it’s no joke. Idolizing food is a sin worthy of destruction! That is why we must carefully heed this admonition:

But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfill the lusts thereof. – Romans 13:14

Gluttony is a lust of the flesh, and there’s nothing funny about that.

Modern Christians, especially those in the Western world, have generally been found wanting in the area of holiness of body. Gluttony and laziness, for example, were regarded by earlier Christians as sin. Today we may look on these as weaknesses of the will but certainly not sin. We even joke about our overeating and other indulgences instead of crying out to God in confession and repentance. – Jerry Bridges

Gluttony was a sin worthy of stoning in Old Testament times. (The sin is just as abominable today, only the punishment may be delayed.) Check this scripture out, concerning the hard choice parents have had to make in regards to their wayward children:

And they shall say unto the elders of his city, This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton and a drunkard. And all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, that he die: so shalt thou put evil away from among you; and all Israel shall hear, and fear. – Deuteronomy 21:20-21

Gluttony is directly linked with stubbornness and rebellion – and as we mentioned previously, drunkenness!  What do we do if we have fallen into such dreadful behaviors? Ephesians 5:15-18 has the recipe for overcoming drunkenness, and if you follow the same recipe, you can overcome gluttony also:

See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is. And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit.

Want to be wise? Want to understand God’s will? Want to redeem your time? You can’t do this with wine, and you can’t do this with food! We must replace these vices with God’s spirit. We must idolize Him (only Him); and deny those things which slow us down when taken to excess.

If you are experiencing the punishment of preoccupation, try out these tips to get your mind back on track…

• Set aside a special time each day to study from God’s word. Set a timer and say “no” to any distractions (including food) until the timer runs out. When there is no question about grabbing a snack, you free your mind to forget about it and focus on the King.

• Brush your teeth. This can trick your mind into thinking it’s time to lay off the food! Besides, who wants to defile a perfectly clean and fresh mouth? Just do it – it helps!

• If you are physically capable, why not try fasting from time to time? It can help shrink your tummy if you do it reasonably often. A smaller tummy leaves less room for food, and less room for food means more room for God if you are determined to be spiritually minded! Last of all, these special days of fasting will leave you unencumbered from thinking about food. When you determine something is not even an option, you eventually stop thinking about it! A clear and free mind is a wonderful thing to have.

Don’t be a glutton for punishment. Flee from preoccupation!

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In conclusion…

“Am I a glutton?” It is a question we all must ask ourselves from time to time. If I want to know the answer, I must put myself to the test by asking three questions of my life.

• Firstly, I will look for a sign in my body: am I experiencing the punishment of pudginess?

• Secondly, I will look for a sign in my soul: am I experiencing the punishment of poverty?

• Lastly, I will look for a sign in my spirit: am I experiencing the punishment of preoccupation?

If the answer is ever “yes” to any of these questions, I will know that the Lord is warning me of serious danger. I must hearken to His chastisement and make a lifestyle change before it’s too late! I must remind myself that:

Gluttony is the act of digging a grave with your own teeth. – Enock Maragesi

Don’t be a glutton for punishment, friends! If we are inclined to engorge ourselves, let us feast solely and continually upon the “Bread of Life”. That is, Jesus Christ our Lord…who fills us all in all. Only in Him will we find the “oil and meal” that continues forevermore.

And Jesus said unto them, I am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst. – John 6:35

For he satisfieth the longing soul, and filleth the hungry soul with goodness. – Psalm 107:9

For God’s glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

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Mrs. Dustin Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.