Destress the Damsel

“Marie Kondo is a tidying expert, bestselling author, star of Netflix’s show, “Tidying Up With Marie Kondo,” and founder of KonMari Media, Inc.

Enchanted with organizing since her childhood, Marie began her tidying consultant business as a 19-year-old university student in Tokyo. Today, Marie is a renowned tidying expert helping people around the world to transform their cluttered homes into spaces of serenity and inspiration.“

What is the KonMari Method?

“Most tidying methods advocate a room-by-room or little-by-little approach, which doom you to pick away at your piles of stuff forever.

The KonMari Method™ encourages tidying by category – not by location – beginning with clothes, then moving on to books, papers, komono (miscellaneous items), and, finally, sentimental items. Keep only those things that speak to the heart, and discard items that no longer spark joy. Thank them for their service – then let them go.

People around the world have been drawn to this philosophy not only due to its effectiveness, but also because it places great importance on being mindful, introspective and forward looking.“

The six basic rules of tidying:

(Above taken from the www.konmari.com “about” page)

The first time my children and I watched a video of Marie Kondo, we were mesmerized. This adorable little Japanese woman has taught us how to do so many simple life tasks more effectively…from packing a suitcase, to folding laundry, to organizing our bedroom drawers. Recently when we were preparing suitcases for bible camp, my son asked me, “Momma, how do I ‘Marie Kondo’ my blanket?” You better believe this young man’s suitcase went to camp in style! The KonMari methods are simple, but we love them because they just plain work.

Now having a tidy house is an admirable goal, as it helps to allow peace and productivity to reign in the home, rather than contention and chaos. However, the focus of today’s lesson is not so much on the tidiness of your surroundings…but on the tidiness of your spirit. We all have some “indoor” cleaning to do, and Marie Kondo is going to give us a hand. Come join in on A Konmari Safari…

Rule 01: Commit yourself to tidying up.

This rule applies whether tidying an apartment or tidying an attitude. Unless we are really serious about making a change, everything will go on much the same as it always has. Houses don’t just willy-nilly clean themselves, and neither do humans…unless they are allowing Christ’s spirit to rule within them. We have to truly want to be “tidy” people in order to make a lasting difference. It’s not enough to feel a moment of inspiration after listening to a podcast on tidying (think: enjoying a good sermon but failing to put it into action). It’s not enough to cram all the clutter into a closet when Great Aunt Helga comes for a visit (think: trying to appear righteous just to impress others). It’s not enough to go through phases of cleanliness (think: giving up sin sporadically). Commitment is essential.

Commit thy works unto the Lord, and thy thoughts shall be established. – Proverbs 16:3

Rule 02: Imagine your ideal lifestyle.

This rule applies whether idealizing a mansion or idealizing a mission. When we imagine the goal for our home, we may flip through the pages of a magazine to look for a model to guide us…that “perfect home” if you will. Maybe we fancy a fun beach vibe, or a cozy fireside feel…whatever the case may be, looking at those picture perfect examples can serve as the groundwork for building our own style. On a much grander scale, Christians have a perfect model to look to in the Lord Jesus Christ. When we flip through the pages of God’s word regularly, we can “see” the ideal and emulate Him for ourselves.

Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave himself up for us, an offering and sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma. – Ephesians 5:1-2 (NASB)

Rule 03: Finish discarding first.

This rule applies whether discarding stuff or discarding sin. A common error people make while tidying is to simply shift clutter from one location to another…never really dealing with the problem at hand, only avoiding it for as long as possible. The thing is, avoiding clutter doesn’t make it disappear. The piles have to be dealt with now, later, or after your death…but they have to be dealt with by someone. Unrepentant sin in our life is much the same way – it catches up to us eventually. The difference is, we can’t wait it out and slough spiritual junk on to our heirs…we and we alone will be responsible for our mess after we leave this earth. Discard sin right away so you don’t end up stuck with it!

…let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us. – Hebrews 12:1b

Rule 04: Tidy by category, not by location.

This rule applies whether categorizing our inventory or our inner man. One reason the KonMari method is so effective is that it forces you to take a closer look. For example, instead of gazing through your closet haphazardly, Mrs. Kondo encourages bringing every article of clothing out into a pile on the bed. Once you bring the items out into the light, expose them for the mountainous excess that they are, and face each item one by one – only then will you truly begin to evaluate each item’s value in your home. We miss a lot with only a quick sweeping glance through the closet, and that’s just how it is when it comes to our inner man, isn’t it? With just a quick sweeping glance at ourselves, we might seem mostly good…pretty clean, after all. Yet God calls us to more…to bring every category of ourselves one by one to the foot of the cross. First, big picture. Then, further inspection.

And they shall teach my people the difference between the holy and profane, and cause them to discern between the unclean and the clean. – Ezekiel 44:23

Rule 05: Follow the right order.

This rule applies whether ordering possessions or perfections. When it comes to following a sense of order, the last thing you want to do is begin discarding those sentimental items that are dear to your heart – save those for last. You want to start small; baby steps! Until we practice letting go of little, insignificant things, we mustn’t foolishly take on more than we’re ready to handle. As we progress in easy areas, we gather strength to tackle the areas that would have initially been nigh to impossible. Our Christian walk is like that. While we are called to be ever growing and progressing, let us start at a pace we’re ready for. As long as we are constantly moving forward, we will be tackling mountains before we know it.

Whom shall he teach knowledge? and whom shall he make to understand doctrine? them that are weaned from the milk, and drawn from the breasts. For precept must be upon precept; line upon line; here a little, and there a little. – Isaiah 28:9-10

Rule 06: Ask yourself if it sparks joy.

This rule applies whether talking about your goods or your gods. If an object in the home is not bringing joy either by pleasure or usefulness, what is the purpose of hanging on to it? Truly our homes would be better off without such goods, for they only give cause for stress and frustration. What about the “gods” in our life? Are the things we “hang on to” bringing lasting pleasure? Are they useful? If not, what purpose do they add to our days? The little gripes and complaints we express, the haughtiness we feel, the time we waste in selfishness…these things don’t spark true joy. Sure, they might make us feel a bit of pleasure in the moment, but ultimately leave us wasting away. Focus on the joy that is good, authentic, and eternal. Keep the things that bring out the very best in you, for Him.

Thy words were found, and I did eat them; and thy word was unto me the joy and rejoicing of mine heart: for I am called by thy name, O Lord of hosts. – Jeremiah 15:16

In conclusion…

I hope that this KonMari Safari has been valuable to you. There is so much that can be learned from the simple things in life…like what a tidy young lady from Japan can unknowingly teach us about our spiritual selves. When you are folding laundry, packing suitcases, organizing drawers…doing whatever your hand finds to do, I hope you will remember that the most important thing to tidy in the home is the people. I encourage you to start the journey, scrap the junk, and spark the joy. Anyone can do it…will we?

Being messy is not hereditary nor is it related to lack of time.

– Marie Kondo

All the ways of a man are clean in his own eyes; but the Lord weigheth the spirits. – Proverbs 16:2

For God’s Glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

Mrs. Dustin Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

To look at life differently, they could not be so bold
Some people don’t grow wiser, they merely grow old.
They remain as they were and think in the same way
And the only change in them is they’ve grown old and gray.

Wisdom is a thing that can serve one quite well
Though also a thing one cannot buy or sell.
Financially well-to-do wise people one might say “rare”
For wisdom will not make you a millionaire.

That the wise are a minority comes as no surprise
For many people grow older, but they do not grow wise.
“No fool like an old fool” you do hear some say
The truth in these words is still living today.
They remain as they were, and think in the same way
And they do not grow wiser, only grow old and gray.

– Francis Duggan

As this poem points out, old age does not always a wise man make. Old age merely serves to reveal who and what we really are, free from the pride and pretense of our youth. While a wise man will tend to grow wiser with age, a fool will tend to grow all the more foolish. As we age, our masks chip away and our true colors are seen in full array. What hues will be displayed in your latter years? Don’t believe the lie that wisdom will find you as you age. On the contrary, you must find wisdom. Wisdom is not a gift to be imparted, but a treasure to be hunted! We would do well to find wisdom before time overtakes us and we have little use left for it in our days.

Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy youth, while the evil days come not, nor the years draw nigh, when thou shalt say, I have no pleasure in them. – Ecclesiastes 12:1

It is not uncommon for one to reach age before beauty. That is to say, many people will become elderly before they so much as begin to take their spirituality seriously. Some won’t even make it that far – and years wasted can not be retrieved. Turning 30, 40, 50, or 99 will not make you wise; the common belief in a mystical, magical “age of wisdom” is erroneous. The age of wisdom is NOW…whether you are a 16 year old or a 60 year old. It is not the maturity of your years that defines you; but the maturity of your spirit.

Readers of all ages: don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today. Wisdom is yours for the taking, calling to you from every direction (Proverbs 8:1-5). Today we will discover three steps to avoid reaching age before beauty. Firstly, we must be…

Better is a poor and a wise child than an old and foolish king, who will no more be admonished*. – Ecclesiastes 4:13 *warned, advised, urged

Why should we be taught before age? Because we retain more of what we learn when in our youth. Language, music, art, sports, and the like, are most easily learned and remembered when taught early. The same is often true in regards to spiritual matters. The older one gets, the harder it is to learn and sustain new concepts.

Embrace the art of listening to and learning from others now..while your mind is keen. You have not fully “arrived” – none of us have. You don’t “know it all” – none of us do. Each of us must lay down our pride in order to age beautifully like the Lord has intended.

…He teaches the humble His way. – Psalm 25:9b (NASB)

There is no shame in being young, only in being unteachable. Young people who close their ears to truth will quickly find themselves reaching age before beauty. Yet what if there is another way – a way to beautify yourself from the inside out before the gray hairs and wrinkles come knocking?

Want to beautify yourself? Be taught before age! Because:

How ill white hairs become a fool and a jester!

– William Shakespeare, 2 Henry IV (1597-98)

Secondly, to avoid reaching age before beauty, we must be…

Ephraim, he hath mixed himself among the people; Ephraim is a cake not turned. Strangers have devoured his strength, and he knoweth it not: yea, gray hairs are here and there upon him, yet he knoweth not. – Hosea 7:8-9

“A cake not turned” – quite the visual description to describe an old person devoid of wisdom. An elderly man or woman may have spent a long time in the “oven” (on the earth), but an experienced baker knows that time in the oven alone does not make a good cake, but is only one variable. A cake may appear crisp and well done on the outside, but still remain not-quite-done in the middle. (i.e. A person that looks old and wise on the outside, but is immature and foolish on the inside) As was the case with Ephraim, one must turn (to the Lord), lest his gray hair be little more than a decoration.

So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts to wisdom. – Psalm 90:12

In other words: Life is short. Don’t waste your youth away on foolishness!

Want to beautify yourself? Be turned before age! Because:

Many foxes grow gray but few grow good.

– Benjamin Franklin

Lastly, to avoid reaching age before beauty, we must be…

I have more understanding than all my teachers: for thy testimonies are my meditation. I understand more than the ancients, because I keep thy precepts. – Psalm 119:99-100

Wisdom comes not from our age, but from our aim. Those who are “tacked” (fixed/fastened) to the Lord, will naturally be wiser than those who aren’t, regardless of how many years spent on this earth. Many believe that wisdom can only come from experience; and while it is true that experience can bring wisdom, this is not always the case.

Days should speak, and multitude of years should teach wisdom. But there is a spirit in man: and the inspiration of the Almighty giveth them understanding. Great men are not always wise: neither do the aged understand judgment. – Job 32:7b-9 (emphasis mine)

Does a drunkard who has experienced 100 hangovers change his ways? Sometimes…but not always. Does a convicted sex offender who has experienced 20 years in prison change his ways? Sometimes…but not always. Does a repeat traffic violator who has experienced multiple tickets change his ways? Sometimes…but not always. Experience alone does not change a person whose love for their sin outweighs their fear of punishment – being tacked to the Lord is what would give them the wisdom they need.

Want to beautify yourself? Be tacked before age! Because:

Age does not necessarily give wisdom; gray hair does not necessarily signify gray matter.

– Leroy Brownlow

In conclusion…

Sometimes the age comes before the beauty, but it doesn’t have to be that way. I have heard it said that “growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional” – this is a truth. Every day, in every choice we make, we are choosing whether to grow older and wiser or merely old and gray.

Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today. Be taught before age, turned before age, and tacked before age. If you are wise, then even in your old age…underneath the gray hair and the wrinkles…will be a person of insurmountable beauty. A real stunner, if you will.

The hoary head is a crown of glory, if it be found in the way of righteousness. – Proverbs 16:31

Those that be planted in the house of the Lord shall flourish in the courts of our God. They shall still bring forth fruit in old age; they shall be fat and flourishing. – Psalm 92:13-14

For God’s Glory,
Mrs. Dustin Bolks

Mrs. Dustin Bolks is a church of Christ preacher’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.